wowashi's profile

I dont know how much effort you put into this screenplay, but its absolutley horrendous..I can only distinguish who the main character is. Its cheesy, theres no climax, no protagonist or antagonist, and the dialogue sucks. Good luck and keep working...

"The suspects couldn’t be too far gone because someone had to have set the bomb." That doesnt make sense. Someone could have set the bomb for more than fifteen minutes. How does Tya know that it started its countdown from fifteen minutes if she'd just spotted it? Dont mention 'Tya" so much. Its as if youre trying to imprint on the reader's brain that the girl's name is Tya. We know that already...A 'she' would suffice. An FBI agent would never wear hair in his/her face. It tends to get in the...

You introduced Red in the middle of the fifth paragraph? Come on...juvenille(shakes head). "I don’t lie very often. However, I love a good story, and to achieve that, I’ll add things so the story is better. Not exaggerations, just improvements. I’m not a hypocrite, however, I find it much easier to go along, rather than fight the current, even when I know it’s wrong. I’m not lazy, but I have little use for work for its own sake, and I’m willing to let other people do things that I could have ...