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LAST LOGIN: August 16
LAST LOGIN: August 16
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22 Reviews
14 Comments
TWO PATRIOTS The air was breezy cool, the sky layered with dark clouds which threatened to unleash its fury at any moment. It was only early in the afternoon but the overcast sky made it seem early evening. In the shelter of a wood at the summit of a hill was a training school of the martial and assassin arts. One of its alumni was in the open-air training courtyard, the only soul to be seen in the empty building. She was kneeling before a small table set in the centre of the courtyard, two b...
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I couldn't put it more aptly or more fittingly. This is a great piece. It's wonderful how you took a well-known tune and put your own words into it. I think I'd end up singing YOUR lyrics to the song now. =D Yours in Christ, Jules
This is great!! I'm itching to hear the rest of Sera and Joan's story. Having recently come to the conclusion that I am in all likelihood bi, this short piece struck a chord deep within. Like Sera, I was lost to her. My heart was somehow stolen from me and I had no say in it. I wasn't looking for a relationship with a woman but it just...happened. This is LOVE. I definitely want to read the rest of this story. It has potential to be published as a novel, if you choose to make it that long. I ...
Kind of reminds me of my own simple black cocktail dress that has seen everything from formal weddings to semi-formal office dos to everything in between. It has become sort of my 'uniform' whenever I am too lazy to pick out an outfit for a special outfit. Too bad everyone notices when a lady wears the same dress twice but not for a man, huh? As for my own business suits, I have a favourite black skirt suit that was off-the-rack but fit me like bespoke. At $70 during the department-store sale...
Hell yeah. Put it to music!!! I see definite potential in this piece. Besides the obvious lyricism [so often lacking from cheesy pop lyrics] there is a rhythm that sets it apart from other poems masquerading as lyrics. I think one of the indications of good lyrics is that the reader can immediately see it as a song, and not just verse. Keep up the good stuff!! Cheers, Jules ;)
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