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verablue's profile
AGE:
24
LOC: SF, CA
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: September 30
LOC: SF, CA
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: September 30
this should sum things up…..
things i like:
photography
circuit boards
rooftop astroturf croquette tea parties
writing
venture brothers
booking live shows
german meat porn
office supplies
buying records
outdated electronics
good old fashioned prison shankings
furries
NYC checkered cabs
coldwave industrial music
old nintendo games
weird movies
the refrigerator graveyard
abandoned french restaurants
DJing
street sign stealing
green chile
machine parts
things i dont like:
girly girls
hipster fashion
needles
old men in latex
hippies
shrimp
san francisco street lay-outs
hippies
diner food
dark roasted coffee
terror EBM
people who walk slowly on sidewalks in front of me
bondage a go go
organi…
Items
Version 1
2 Reviews
2 Comments
There’s red paint slabbed on the kitchen faucet From you trying to cover your scars And the cliché drains from your arms like a 15 year old goth girl’s story I’ve read those lines so many times, so many ways, so many lives before And your misery fogs up the kitchen windows Little beads like blood and sweat drip down the dirty glass Four more weeks, in four more cities They’ve let you down this time, no more I don’t envy your assertion to failure Dried ruby red tulips lining linoleum dressed ...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
3 Reviews
3 Comments
She inhales the smoke rings like autumn On the back porch She has a new obsession (it must be Tuesday…) Just like the last week never happened And I know by Saturday I’ll be bailing her out of that old brick house And she’ll be scratching and prying At the windows of the liquor store I can’t remember what living felt like before… Before I lived (for her) I’m picking up the pieces of her broken heart, Perfectly placing every stitch to make sure she appears whole (On the outside) She’s eyeing ...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
3 Reviews
0 Comments
(so it's going to be one of those weeks, is it?) This is bound to be a mess… Fragments of a bombshell romance Detonate. It’s that hot summer edge When nightfall twists between my legs Just like black hail on the horizon I never asked much But I’m at a loss for words. Even my usual poison of sex dressed as innocence Seems tattered and worn at the edges So I beg for silence One last goodnight kiss And it’s just a metaphorical intake Like blades of blue grass Sharp glass Staying over for heartb...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
4 Reviews
2 Comments
I hate you when you play the angel, Standing in the corner wearing your psychology face. And I’m silent because I can’t stand the way you manage to always rationalize everything. Just for a moment I want to view the world as unjust for not folding to my expectations. And I hate you when you play the angel But still I sit you down on the living room couch. And I watch you, captivated, As you create a neat little list of my flaws over coffee flavoured sludge. And we laugh about my failure, You...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
3 Reviews
4 Comments
Drag the blade down through martini ramblings Measuring time in cigarettes I’m swallowing words with saccharin promises They taste just like childhood Just like ambition 3 nails left to be hammered in place Slamming down this prevarication on blue keys And tiny metal stamps A desolated story A split lip A violent kiss I want more…
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Reviews
this is great for a first piece (you should have seen my first poem, lol....yours is much better). i liked the pain portrayed in the first part, and ending on a note of hope was a nice touch. your descriptions are vivid. i would work on the middle a little bit, mainly "My heart longs to be free, I want to be freed and live my life,", i feel you could reword it in a stronger way....replace the second "freed" with something else to make it less redundant. other than that, great job!
i like it for the most part...i would suggest changing "Everything turns black and white" to "everything turns gray", i think it would keep the flow a bit smoother. i also think changing the wording in the last line to "just a handprint in my mind" would give it more of a sense of the lingering sadness in the ending.
its a nice little description of a snippet in time...but i think it needs more...what made this moment so significant? how did she effect you? i would also work a bit on the ending, make it more powerful.
this felt very jumbled and random....which i like for the most part, but i would like to see a little more direction in there. you use some great and unique wording, but i couldn't even begin to contemplate what this piece is about. the ending also felt a bit unfinished to me.
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