tvirusjunkie23's profile
AGE:
22
LOC: United States
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: December 05
LOC: United States
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: December 05
This user has not yet uploaded an urbis user description/profile.
Items
Version 1
2 Reviews
0 Comments
The dungeon cell of the spacecraft was pitch-black. Skeletons littered the floor and the smell of urine and feces was overpowering. On the back wall were three sets of shackles. Inhabiting the right and left sets of shackles were the former remains of Platerran prisoners and tattered clothes which by one soft touch would shatter. The middle set of shackles contained a living Platerran female prisoner whom was slowly becoming one among the dead. She was on her knees head hung down and her hand...
Version 1
0 Reviews
0 Comments
I run all day and all night The constant motion of my legs running Arms going up and down Adrenaline pumping through my veins I run from a constant darkness That threatens to consume The monster is chasing down the path Which I have chose A path I wish I didn’t take But now it is too late I jump over the gap in the bridge I barely make it Ropes are closing in everywhere I am lost to the ropes diminishing in size Coming for me I’m in a black void now With the ropes around me They...
Version 1
0 Reviews
0 Comments
Blood leaked down the walls Red and gleaming The effects of torture through mine eyes alone The dancing goggle of fairies swooned me towards them In the mist I danced ‘till my feet bled And even then I kept going Never did the light shine ahead Not in my ignorant bliss Time flies by when you’re having so much fun Why you never think of consequence And when the ticking of the clock ensues When you’re bloody hand seeks you Terror ensnares with a viceful grip Crushing all hope ...
Version 1
0 Reviews
0 Comments
Blood leaked down the walls Red and gleaming The effects of torture through mine eyes alone The dancing goggle of fairies swooned me towards them In the mist I danced ‘till my feet bled And even then I kept going Never did the light shine ahead Not in my ignorant bliss Time flies by when you’re having so much fun Why you never think of consequence And when the ticking of the clock ensues When you’re bloody hand seeks you Terror ensnares with a viceful grip Crushing all hope...
Version 1
6 Reviews
2 Comments
I am a wandering soul lost Always searching for some type of belonging And failing miserably My cadence is nothing My social skills zero I will never be accepted I will never be myself Always hiding Under a straight-edge mask Never to find the peace I seek I care too much and lose control People step on me all the time And I never realize it I am the outcast that knows and understands All nothing and all everything I am the huge pushover I am the one no one likes The one that could disappea...
[ View all items ]
Reviews
I can't really give you a great critique. Everything was clear in the story. You certainly know how to hook a reader. During your battle scenes I felt like I was right there and possibly in a videogame. That is a compliment I am giving you. I can't wait to read the next Chapter in this. You should seriously consider getting this story published.
This was an amazing story. The only thing I will suggest is you work on spelling. Other than that this had amazing clarity and I could sympathize with the main character. Keep up the good work.
This was a good piece. However, you should develop it into something more.
It was a great story but you need to work more on description. You are forcing the reader to do to much work by minimal description. Even though minimal is favorable you have to be more clear. Other than that I enjoyed this story. I am a scifi junkie. Have a good laugh.
[ View all reviews ]
Favorites
People






