transcriber's profile
AGE:
55
LOC: United Kingdom
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: November 06
LOC: United Kingdom
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: November 06
Based in the UK for now.
Procrastinator extraordinaire.
Published in 1996 (don’t ask).
Novel two well received but languishes unsold.
Novel three on the way.
Need a new agent as current one seems to have run off with a copy editor from Uxbridge.
Items
Version 1
16 Reviews
6 Comments
All this started out as my diary, more or less. Hindsight, and more knowledge of events, means I've gone back and filled in bits where I wasn't around. Some of the people of Kickingwall have come to mean a lot to me. Sometimes I disappear from the pages altogether. So this story is just as much about them as me. Which is as it should be. The twins, John and Alice, didn't exist when I first began scribbling. Now look at them. Teenagers already. I taught them how to blow their noses and tie the...
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Yes, tension built nicely. It works for me. The only thing that 'pulled me up' was the dialogue punctuation. This will put off potential publishers. ”Take a good look.” Said the wolf. should read ”Take a good look,” said the wolf. ... and so on.
My mother's similar. My ex-wives, on the other hand, need several houses to store their posessions.
Repetition of 'must have' (been) I would not want to read more - there are no questions that need answerng, nothing about to happen other than the vague possibility of a 'restoration'. Nothing has grabbed my attention, am not left wondering what's going to happen next. What 'adventure' is Matt about to have? and so on I think a much bolder start is needed to make me want to read further.
That was very moving and has struck a cord, moving me to tears despite the fact I have no idea what a father is having never experienced one myself. Your narrative voice is strong and consistent and - I know this is of no use to you - keep writing just like that. I'd like to read more.
As a novel treatment? Nope - does not work. As a poem - maybe. Too many Spelling Errors: It's - Its priestlike - Looks odd maybe hyphernate? deciption - depiction Drifiting - Drifting dropletes - droplets noance - nuance appartion - apparition hearafter - hereafter Vapor - Vapour (US sp.?) Appocoliptic - Apocalyptic mana - manna
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