this_is_glamour's profile
AGE:
19
LOC: Pittsburgh, PA
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: November 21
LOC: Pittsburgh, PA
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: November 21
I love writing and thinking and learning in general.
I have a strange fascination with what some may call dry or old style English writing. I think the proper language usage is a huge reason for that.
In my writing, I have little to no form. While i think there is defiantly uses for writing with a specific form, whatever that may be, I mostly find it limiting and just do whatever i want. Many times my writing is fragmented but I kinda like it that way.
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Version 4
2 Reviews
0 Comments
Every time I hear some cliché indie love song, I want to scream back at it. Not even at the song, at him. I think about how I wanted to melt into his bones and breathe his heartbeat and feel him feeling my love. I wanted to squeeze my life and his together and proceed as one entity. My body ached and I hated myself for not being him. My lungs and heart and brain all wanted that love; that same intensity to last forever. Longer than forever because there would never be enough time to be with ...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 3
2 Reviews
0 Comments
Every time I hear some cliché indie love song, I want to scream back at it. Not even at the song, at him. I think about how I wanted to melt into his bones and breathe his heartbeat and feel him feeling my love. I wanted to squeeze my life and his together and proceed as one entity. My body ached and I hated myself for not being him. My lungs and heart and brain all wanted that love; that same intensity to last forever. Longer than forever because there would never be enough time to be with ...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 2
21 Reviews
1 Comment
Every time I hear some cliché indie love song, I want to scream back at it. Not even at the song, at him. I think about how I wanted to melt into his bones and breathe his heartbeat and feel him feeling my love. I wanted to squeeze my life and his together and proceed as one entity. My body ached and I hated myself for not being him. My lungs and heart and brain all wanted that love; that same intensity to last forever. Longer than forever because there would never be enough time to be with h...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 2
1 Review
0 Comments
So it's cold pizza and some vodka and I rode around all night 3AM and the secret’s dead Everything we never said This seperations kind of strange Addiction to withdrawl Say hello – and bye again A sad song for my heart.
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Version 1
1 Review
0 Comments
Silence makes strangers Secrets kill lies I remember you saying "Somehow we'll survive" But clouds gow heavy When they need to rain And you can try all you want But there'll still be a stain You can regret our past But I can't forget I can pray for absolution You can't beg me to stay Momatter what we say, Our ghosts are revolving doors Central tendacies in pivot, Endless compromise of tilt Secrets spoken Are secrets learned But don't say a word And you can forget everything we had Renouce, an...
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Reviews
Good overall, building building building... and she doesn't do anything but wash another dish. Kinda makes me want to smack her. The overall style got kind of annoying.. it was too much continuation and not enough meat. I know that thought flow like that... but saying and, and , and. he just fits he just fits. That will work for emphasis in some places but I feel that it detracts from the overall value of this particular piece. Good write.
Not bad. I would probably agree with you in the faster speed. The main annoyance with this is how you say the same thing for the first 4 lines of every verse. Isn't that what a chorus is for? just my opinion, but I think it would actually be stronger if you removed them or moves it to the chorus. The last 4 lines of verse three really don't flow as well for me.
haha i like it. Leaves so much to the imagination. The last sentance barely fits and I can't follor it. otherwise-awesome
The first eight lines are the strongest. At times, it seems as though you have made your point, but you take too long to do it, using words you don't need to. The line about the thief seems to overdo it, unless there is something more you haven't elaborated upon, in which case you should. How was he a thief? was it really yours or does it just seem like it should be? "nothing seemed suffice" should add a word before suffice. probably "to" "eventhough" two words "just a chance for my affection...
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