sapphiresunbeam's profile
AGE:
24
LOC: Sturbridge, MA
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: March 05
LOC: Sturbridge, MA
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: March 05
Kara Emily Krantz.
I’ve been writing poetry since I was a little girl, as a means of escaping childhood. I did a decent job. Now, as a young adult, I try to take my writing more seriously… to speak what my soul is screaming to say- in an attempt to speak to the world the way it speaks to me.
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Version 1
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steam rises from us heat meets my ebb and your flow still... i let you go.
Version 1
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too old to see; too young to die she hunches over as people pass her by. perhaps in the midst of sips of tea she allows her mind to wander free. [dancing through cataract-clouded memories] snapshots of earthen grassy hills where she sipped her fill of joy. images of sapphire silken streams where she fell in love with a boy. outlines of strength in her daddy's hands as he gave her the courage to dream. hints of the scents of morning glory mist when the world was more than it seemed. snippets o...
Version 2
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if i read you pablo neruda with faux spanish lilts will you smile at me deliciously listen to the inflections in my voice until we fall asleep in a blanket of momentos silenciosos. if i read you spanish poetry will you adóreme. remind me of kindness with your warm liquid eyes. i barely comprehend all the parts of you i recognize. if i sing you pablo neruda to the sounds of your guitar are we sharing music or poetry or perhaps it is eternity. mira... how your silent moments awaken such sweet s...
Version 1
0 Reviews
0 Comments
if i read you pablo neruda with faux spanish lilts will you smile at me deliciously listen to the inflections in my voice until we fall asleep in a blanket of momentos silenciosos. if i read you spanish poetry will you adóreme. remind me of kindness with your warm liquid eyes. i barely comprehend all the parts of you i recognize. if i sing you pablo neruda to the sounds of your guitar are we sharing music or poetry or perhaps it is eternity. mira... how your silent moments awaken such sweet s...
Version 1
0 Reviews
0 Comments
this too shall fade away - this pressing of my heart inside my chest - this need to place my hand against the warmth of your palm this too shall fade away once I have found the perfect balm to heal my hopeful heart and all the other parts of me that feel happy when you're close to me.
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Reviews
WOW. I love this. It was hot at times, sexy at others, depraved here, desperate there. And then you actually somehow made a deep statement about beliefs and this/that. I really liked it a lot. I wish I had something more to say than just "duh i really liked it" but it's true... keep up the good work! :) "Lying there pretending She was ready" = loved the way these two lines flowed together.
First of all, the title line is incredible. Really great. I can't blame you for preferring to be a nature-poet. I tend to be the opposite, and focus on interpersonal relationships, but I love what you have done here - enough to inspire me to try something of the like. "Hope lies in simple woodland walks." = nice line. Overall, this poem is quite lovely. It's smooth and the tone is gentle, and yet you somehow incorporate semi-political/activist statements about logging corporations and such-- ...
I certainly related to this, and i found that you had some good expressions. however, i found the format a little too restrictive- by denying yourself any movement away from the final 'rejected' of each stanza, you took away some of your emotion, and therefore much of the power of your words. i thought the endign stanza was well-put. good job.
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Okay LOVED the ending - it was sweet and perfect. I stumbled in the beginning a little - perhaps what you wanted, but it actually made it quite hard to get into the poem. I wanted an easier entrance, so I could feel your wonderful flow after that more clearly and fluently.
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