rrjs's profile

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AGE: 59
LOC: Foristell, MO
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: May 20

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Items
Version 1
14 Reviews   4 Comments
Mixology as Religion Life poured into a glass of clear ice 198 proof / purity is an impossibility I add sugar and lime to taste Bitters to settle the heartburn From what goes in to fill My half full cup of years The fates are said to have the recipe Over contents they have no control Slightly Shaken A laughing one eyed wolf Smirking coyote at his side Lap at a tip jar filled with pain In the back bar mirror As I inhale the draught It is mellow at around 80 proof Better than the common 5 % bre...
Poetry / Missouri Haibun
Version 2
14 Reviews   1 Comment
Missouri Haibun Out behind the coop a Rhode Island Red rooster and I got into a staring match. Suddenly he attacked and I broke and ran. Granny was carrying a basket of wet laundry down the back porch walk. In a pale blue print dress that had seen too many washings. It softened the look of her sharp angular frame. I flew by her, my head swiveling back to see the rooster closing in for the kill. She shifted the weight of the heavy basket to her left hip. Her right arm became a blur. She had g...
Ratings & Rankings
Poetry / Poetic Ichor
Version 1
14 Reviews   5 Comments
Poetic Ichor My quill has dipped into lady Brigid’s heart Drained of inspiration my love lies on linen No false modesty / I dress her in the finest rags Pricked by the pen of this humble poet Saga’s blood flowing freely on my sheets Her image impressed over fine watermark I stroke her Asian twin with sable brush Creating ideographic stains on silk Shabbat Hamalka has taught me the “Word” Will Yaweh’s jealousy demand revenge Sands of time blotting up the essence of my soul Tea and wine create ...
Ratings & Rankings
Poetry / Missouri Haibun
Version 1
1 Review   1 Comment
One summer when I was just a tad was spent on my bachelor uncle’s dairy farm. Uncle Felix the responsible one no longer paid much attention to his chickens. A few had escaped the chicken yard and were what is now referred to as free range. Then it just meant nobody cared enough to chase them down. Buddy was the one who had been kicked in the head by a mule and as his mental and emotional development was arrested at around fourteen years old he became more a pal than an uncle. My Granny cooke...
Poetry / Perfect Kiss
Version 1
16 Reviews   0 Comments
Her wide eyed look As I take control I anoint both eyes First the right and then the left Lids shudder beneath my lips My right hand which had gently cupped her neck Feathers down to the small of her back Joining my left as her hips tense forward My mouth embraces hers My arms enfold her Our warmth radiates a stirring spice It begins from here …. R.R.J.Sebacher ©
Ratings & Rankings
Reviews
Poetry / Paper Thin
Greetings Ignore the ratings as I find them less than useful. Second Stanza Try a different word than "on". "Most" would work. Fourth stanza replace "heard", "overlap" or "challenged" would work. Fifth stanza replace "once" "finally " or "then" would work. Clarity and gramatical correctness would be the reason for the changes. There are of course other possible choices that might express your meaning better. Nice poem.
Greetings Nice Limerick. You might want to use tail instead of tale, as I doubt she was selling a story.
Poetry / After Love
Greetings Hate the ratings . I just fill them out because I have to. Very nice work. You need a transition for him to leave unless you mean for this to be magic. Suggestion - instead of - As he faces the water’s needling,- try - a bit of soap gets in her eye. Word finally in second line is not needed.
Poetry / Alone
Greetings This works as a found poem. When not set up for a class assignment, you should include the author's name along with the title of the work you are borrowing from. The page numbers are not neccesary except perhaps for your class assignment. It would enhance poem if you could show the conflict causing the pain and loneliness described so aptly.
Poetry / Massage Therapy
Greetings Line -9 seems to be dialogue, perhaps you should offset it( give it a stanza of its own) and or italicise it to indicate this. 4th line from end - is mine supposed to be my - if not you might try stanza break after to seperate two seperate thoughts. Nice poem. Keep writing.
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