First I would like to start off by telling you that you have a great way with words. When you write you have a way of engaging the reader. I felt as though I was taking each step with her, which made for a more dramatic end. Did you repeat this paragraph for emphasis? To suggest how in sync they were with one another perhaps? I Elated, she lifts the heavy rectangular silver box, richly engraved swirling embellishment decorating the curved edges, admiring it, adoring it, she hugs it close to h...

This was superbly written. The story had so many underlining meanings to it. I couldn’t stop reading it once I started. You have such a flare for detail. The only error that I noticed is on page 11 “but for the books may”…. I am not sure if that was just my error as a reader or perhaps you had forgotten a word. I thoroughly enjoyed your writing I look forward to reading more of your work. I found this page very touching, you could feel the chemist great regret of this tragedy. This so ofter h...

This is a very nice piece and you could certainly feel the pain of heartbreak the only thing that I could suggest is for it to flow a little better is to remove the because the from the sentence. I think it reads better without it. I am not an expert though that's just my opinion other than that I thought it was very good.

Wow, that was simply amazing. I really got drawn into the characters. I could feel for Charlie and Ryan's dilemma. It was heartbreaking. I felt myself tear up when she did. Very good visualization as well I could picture the scene with little effort. I’m really excited to read the next installments. The only thing that I didn’t like was the cursing. I know that how real people talk and some might understand that’s what you were trying to do however I thought that it could have done without it...

That was amusing. I think that we could all imagine doing something like that when we are highly annoyed. Was this an actual situation or did you just imagine the scenario? It was very well written. I especially loved the last line I actually chuckled out loud the only thing that I would recommend is that you tend to use the word And alot it makes it a little choppy to read but overall I really enjoyed this. My son really liked it too.

I really enjoyed the rhythm in this piece. It flowed very nicely. "The future is mine.., the time is yours" Very strong line. I look forward to reading more from you.

I give you kudos to being a non-conformist. The young people seem to flock towards these ultra “trendy” coffee shops like a herd of thirst stricken animals at watering hole. This was a cleverly written and enjoyable read. I myself have had a difficult time when stuck at an airport trying to order just a simple coffee it’s not an easy feat. Very amusing and I certainly look forward to reading more of your work.

This story was very expressive. I enjoyed and could sympathize with the writer. I would suggest restructuring this piece. I would also recommend that this be placed in the poetry section as it is more geared towards that aspect. You have great potential. I love that you shared this with us. Keep up the great work.