I don't know what it is about this poem, but I just can't get enough. I read it over a few times, such wonderfull wording and visuals. A bit of a twisted love poem. Nice work! Don't understand the title, but not sure if I'm supposed to.

Defintly like the comparison you've done with music and color, and how you made sure to tie the color analogy back in at the end. Two parts of the piece I thought you could have done without: talking about Jay-z, and mentioning that Edan has a girlfriend, those parts just didn't seem to flow with the rest of the piece (for me.) Great work though, very informative!

Yes!! I loved it. And My oh my how ever do I relate. Being bipolar is the best. Without it I would be a lifeless zombie. Your style of writing is decent, you kept my attention, and had me laughing. I got a little lost at the end, not sure if that was yours or my ADD peaking through. Hope to review more of your stuff.

So am I correct in my understanding that this story is about a girl who killed her friend because she wanted her hair. If so, great twist ending. I liked it. It would be kinda cool if you had more short stories like this, (characters with a secret) and compiled them into a book or something.

One of the better haikus I've read in a while. Very sweet, simple and reveals a certain rare innocence. No real criticisms here. Do you have any longer pieces?

Love the title, neutral about the overall poem,not sure about the ending; Intrusion of you just doesn't sound right. This is the common message of the times, thats why I'm just neutral on the poem, think you could add something to spice it up and make it stand out. Do like your style though and think a lot of people could relate and would enjoy reading this.

Kudos! This is a great quote.

From a critical story writting point of view this could use some work, unless you were going for a casual journal, nothing too comlpex or interesting, type of entry. ......I agree with you on some angles of your essay, I don't think that people should be ashamed of listing to Justin, he's great for dancing to. (Talent would be another conversation though, especially if your comparing to people who spend every second of the day composing music till their fingers bleed, this would not include t...

I like the overall meassage of the poem, and the hidden analogies. Though I did think it was a bit jumpy at times, mostly towards the end.

This may be obvious, but what is a crystalline seed? I really enjoyed the visual descriptions in the middle section of the poem, but was rather thrown off by the end, it was just too much, perhaps would be better if shortened a little.