missusmo's profile
AGE:
56
LOC: New Zealand
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: September 14
LOC: New Zealand
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: September 14
I’m Mo, I’m English, and I live now in a remote coastal area of rural New Zealand with my writer husband John. I’ve been writing seriously for at least fifteen years, and I’ve had work published in anthologies, newspapers, print magazines and ezines.
I run several online writing groups with my husband, and we also co-run a local live poetry group.
I love to write!
This is my website:
http://www.poetrymo.co.nz
Items
Version 1
9 Reviews
7 Comments
How are you? Man, don’t say, ‘How are you?’ then turn away before the question’s even settled between us. Not today. Do you really want an answer? Or was your question just as meaningless as ‘Have a nice day!’ When you ask me how I am, you’d better be prepared for the fuckin answer. I was laid off work last week, and my old woman’s pregnant with our fifth kid, just goes to show you the tube-tying was a waste of friggin money. The youngest kid came home from school yesterday with drugs in his ...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
60 Reviews
6 Comments
EN Police Scene of Death Report Note left by Jessica Barnes, deceased. Apparent cause of death: Ingestion of household bleach, barbiturates and alcohol. Suzie, my dearest friend, I ask you neither to condone nor to understand. All I ask of you now is that you take a few minutes to listen to what I have to say, and make your judgement, as you will. Your thoughts and actions can no longer harm me for I will not be on this earth and will not be sorry for that fact. I will be going to join him – ...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
13 Reviews
4 Comments
demons race through the valley sweeping over hills sneaking above treetops seeking me out as I cower in vain knees to chin back scraping rough bark swooping and teasing ripping clothes prodding and poking shivering skin cruel fingers icy touch sending chills through flesh as they scream insane laughter into a louring sky © Mo Irvine
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Reviews
Hi there, Traditionally haiku, senryu and tanka do not have titles or capital letters. Linked series are acceptable, as you have done here, but they shouldn't tell a story. So in my book these are neither haiku nor senryu, but simply one poem. I have talked at length elsewhere about the 5-7-5 controversy regarding haiku. When Basho created the format, his haiku were indeed 5-7-5 - but that count was for Japanese characters, not English syllables. There are many excellent haiku sites on the In...
Okay. I am of course reading this "blind": I don't know who you are or anything about you. Not that that would colour or change this critique - but it would be interesting... This is pretentious. Trying to be clever and sometimes succeeding, it is however far too whiskery and needs a severe haircut. Stream of consciousness it isn't, as the play on words is far too obvious. Sometimes that works, but often it doesn't. I think the first four stanzas work quite well but after that the poem seems ...
Well, you certainly brought a smile to this reviewer's face! And that's what senryu are partly about, so in that respect you succeeded. This suffers from the constraints of the 5-7-5 format. Let it break free, get rid of the capitals and the comma, and turn it into something more ambiguous. Here's what you'd have then: writing haiku: who says I am wasting time Happy writing! Mo
Hi, I enjoyed this at first, but have to say I lost interest a bit in the middle, because the format didn't seem to be for any real reason. I can understand using format for emphasis but when every other line is indented then it becomes part of the norm and any implied emphasis is lost. After "I look" you use capitals to begin every line and I'm sure that's not a mistake, as the general presentation of this poem seems too polished. Therefore you are using capitals for a reason, but I can't fo...
This is a senryu which falls into the 5-7-5 trap, a style which is still seen amongst writers in English-speaking countries (though not very often in respected haiku publications). It's actually not bad, and has definite potential as a senryu. Generally, senryu have a human element, and often a hint of humour, and haiku have an element of nature. Both should encapsulate a moment, and should NOT tell a story - at least, not in the conventional way. There's the catch, and that's what makes haik...
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