mfrost's profile
AGE:
47
LOC: Rochester, NY
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: July 18
LOC: Rochester, NY
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: July 18
I write poetry that celebrates Great Souls and the strides they’ve taken toward evolutionizing our thinking, our social rights, our commonwealth, and our ecosystems. I celebrate Great Souls such as Mohandas Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Mandela, and Muhammad Yanus.
I prefer to write in traditional forms but I enjoy poetry of all styles.
Items
Version 2
5 Reviews
0 Comments
For peace the nations speak with one Resounding voice to say: The end of wars can be achieved If we united stay. For peace the poets sing their songs And plead with those who hear: Please, let us now renounce our hate And conquer all our fear. For peace the saints all teach that God Would have men freely live, So let’s now live as God would have And each the past forgive. For peace the Sufis build a bridge From God to man below, So let’s receive the blessings that Our God’s love does bestow. ...
Version 1
7 Reviews
4 Comments
Muhammad Yunus, micro financier And founder of the growing Grameen Bank, I cheer The evolutionary strides you’ve made In bringing the poor some needed banking aid. With just a twenty-seven dollar start, In Nineteen-Seventy-Six, you put your heart To work in Bangladesh to find a way A simple bank could poverty allay. You loaned to those who had the greatest need And guided them until they did succeed. And when they paid you back, you loaned again Until your bank became a great campaign. You’ve...
Version 1
5 Reviews
3 Comments
Yes, Doctor King, it is your praise I raise! You were Drum Major in the noble quest For freedom in a world of dispossessed. You changed the world by serving the oppressed. Your voice and willingness to serve I praise! “Avoid romanticizing King,” some say. “He was no saint.” And they say I do Disservice to you and them to view You more than the common man they knew. They say that I your memory betray. But I will celebrate your soul: *You did your duty as a Christian ought; *You brought salvati...
Version 1
5 Reviews
1 Comment
I am delighted with our diversity. It’s all the rage for me. ‘Though some may pass On its fine charms and rage against my set, I’ll still be charmed with everything that’s made The world so right. I simply cannot bear To think how dull the world would be if on Us all some moldy mold was settled on. Boring! What’s life without diversity? What force of pall would force us all to pass Some test of similarity? Who’d set The standards we’d have to meet? Would you be made To be like me, or me like ...
Version 1
6 Reviews
7 Comments
Rolihlahla Mandela, may your name Be always raised when we Great Souls proclaim. Your noble struggle in South Africa to end Apartheid’s blight on black and white and mend The painful past that held such dominance Was more than just of local consequence. It has reverberated ‘round the world. It has a new peace consciousness unfurled. Because you chose to use non-violence to remove Apartheid from the land, you helped improve The lives of those oppressed, without A bloody revolutionary rout. You...
[ View all items ]
Reviews
The poem does read well aloud - which is a testament to your ability with words and rhythm. Unfortunately, the tone is pontificating. The theme is good; worthy of poetry. I think it would be more palatable as satire, though (think Steven Colbert in the Colbert Report).
If this is meant to be a quick ars poetica exercise to amuse yourself, it's fine. There's nothing wrong with amusing yourself. If you are serious about putting it up for critique, here's a few suggestions: 1) ditties work best as plays on rhythm. I think you should standardize the meter between the two halves of the poem. 2) Stress the break between halves by putting a period at the end of line five. 3) Word choice: I seldom think of a muse speaking in "gray" (line 8). Given the "sky" referen...
This is poetic but not poetry. It is lovely prose, though. Here's a couple of things to consider. Your first sentence creates confusion. Since a person does not normally "glisten," I thought the sentence was mis-written. It wasn't until I got to the third sentence that I realized that the narrator did mean that she glistened. I had to go back and start again - but the image still did not work for me. "Simply" in sentence two is wordy; it adds nothing and sounds overly romantic. "Till" in the ...
Overall I enjoyed the lyrics. Unfortunately a full critique of a poem this long would cost you too many points (I suggest you post it one sub-song at a time). Here's a few notes on the first part. S1/L1: the repetition of "on" is distracting. S2/L3-4: excellent. S4/L1: "freaking" is oddly used (is it a colloquialism?). S4/L3-4: "my beard" and "adolescent" provides opposing images. S5/L1: "make you care" makes the main character seem unsympathetic. S6/L1: "we've" is in the wrong tense; it shou...
Your storytelling abilities are outstanding. Having said that, this is the least successful of the three poems of yours I've seen. Your (over) use of ellipses makes the piece feel disconnected. There should be a colon after "path" in stanza two. There's more, but I'd rather do it in Comments so as to save you points.
[ View all reviews ]
Favorites
People












