Insightful comments. I categorize this as lyric poetry. I did not label it as song lyric because I did not want it viewed as “pop,” or “rock,” or “country,” etc. I sing it a cappella (to the tune of Amazing Grace) to my children (3 and 2 years old) at bedtime. I’ve written a few “evolutionary lullabies” (see my profile page) for my children and sing them with the standard nursery rhythms. My children are big fans of my work :).
Poetry / For Peace
For peace the nations speak with one
Resounding voice to say:
The end of wars can be achieved
If we united stay.
For peace the poets sing their songs
And plead with those who hear:
Please, let us now renounce our hate
And conquer all our fear.
For peace the saints all teach that God
Would have men freely live,
So let’s now live as God would have
And each the past forgive.
For peace the Sufis build a bridge
From God to man below,
So let’s receive the blessings that
Our God’s love does bestow.
For peace our heroes gave their lives
And paid our freedom’s price,
So let’s give them the honors due
Their holy sacrifice.
For peace let’s each resolve today
To conquer all our fear,
Forgive the past, receive God’s love
And hold our heroes dear.
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LC reviewed Version 2 -
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I realy like your style of writing…you don’t add a lot of ponies, rainbows, and glittery stuff like a lot of “writers” do today. It’s very hopeful and inspiring…
“For peace our heroes gave their lives
And paid our freedom’s price,
So let’s give them the honors due
Their holy sacrifice”-I love this part because it shows that our soldiers are doing whatever is necessary, but some people don’t respect that as much as they should..
~LC<3
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missunique45 reviewed Version 2 -
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This piece was thought revoking and I feel the same way. Though well written and clear I did feel the emotions I’m sure you want to envoke. The first two stanzas were very well written and may work better as clsing to the poem as they are very strong.
Sparkles reviewed Version 2 -
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I would say that this sounds done. I like it because it is stirring, patriotic and brought tears to my eyes. Well done. Small warning, God is a touchy subject for many people.
radar reviewed Version 2 -
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I enjoyed this piece. The flow was very nice and the meaning was clear. I especially appreciated the second to last stanza regarding our heroes. I hope you get this poem published. Very nicely done.
casey_faded reviewed Version 2 -
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A good poem, though saying that is was based on Amazing Grace me made slow down while reading it – one of the down sides to being a singer. Not my style, but good.
pricillacox reviewed Version 1 -
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Do you think that this perhaps should be under “song lyrics”? I do not think this is a poem, simply put. However, you seem to be aware it is for something else. It’s a peace-laden political song. For what it’s meant to be, it does very well. I’m not sure if this is the place for it though. It seems complete and like it should be sung amongst a family, or something of the sort.
TheStormofWar reviewed Version 1 -
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As adaptations go, this isn’t bad. It’s not really memorable, however. The first stanza sets up nicely, though I am not sure as to the need for the repetition at the end. I don’t feel its strong enough to anchor or be repeditive, as such.
The second to last stanza feels directed to the US, which feels slightly out of place given its for a day declared by the United Nations.
I would probably rework the last two stanzas to keep up your idea of world events, and a call to all people to lay down arms for the sake of peace. I think it would work better that way.
RiaanFourie reviewed Version 1 -
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“Please, let us set aside our hate
And with it all our fear.”
Spot on!! Thats very good, very conscise. I did not like the repitition though, I understand if it was done to show urgency and/or importance but to do so is simply insulting readers. It was nice though. I truly enjoyed the lines I quoted.
redpoyzin reviewed Version 1 -
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I think that this poem is great because all the writer is asking from us is simply for a day of peace. The writer is very adamant about allowing peace to become part of our way of life.
One day, one day, one day for peace
One day, one day for peace:
Let’s lay aside our guns one day,
One day, one day for peace.
For peace the poets sing their songs
And plead with those who hear:
Please, let us set aside our hate
And with it all our fear.
I love this part being a poet my self this sounds so sweet.
I love this part
BSRiter reviewed Version 1 -
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I thought that this was a good song infused with hope. It does fill me with regret that we can but hope for merely one day for peace in this world of ours and even that might be too much to ask for some.
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