Thank you! I am especially pleased that you understand what I was trying to get across so well. Much appreciated!
Poetry / Long Live Dancing Jon
Angel’s sing their heavenly song
And down below mortal’s cry
Someone they loved is forever gone
And they are left to wonder why.
Memories wash over them
As they sit up late into the night
Smiling as they remember him
Crying because it isn’t right.
Days pass by and life moves on
Leaving behind their shattered souls
All that’s left is the rising dawn
To somehow fill the gaping holes.
Angel’s sing their heavenly song
And down below mortal’s smile
Someone they loved is forever gone
But they got to know him for a little while.
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Waldo_Pharce reviewed Version 1 -
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The last line is too long. It interupts the flow. I like the rest and wish it was a little longer and told more about Dancing Jon.
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poetic003 reviewed Version 1 -
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I love how this poem border’s on the sad, but brings joy in the fact that a loved one was cherised if only for a short time. I forces the reader to realize that God loans our loved ones to us, and that each day should be lived to the fullest and not taken for granted. Beautifully written!
casey_faded reviewed Version 1 -
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I could relate to this poem, it connected with me and so I liked it. I usually don’t go for rhyming poetry (I guess because I can’t write it well, and thatannoysme)- but this works.
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