Journal, Diary, & Blogging / I Know a Good Deal

Dawn came in with a whisper. There was no fanfare, just a gradual exchange of moonlight to sunlight in various shades of grey. But it was enough to awaken my aging eyes and get my bones moving in a vertical direction. I prayed that maybe today would bring much-needed rains to my little town. The grass has withered and faded and brown tufts have long since replaced the lovely emerald canopy that once covered the rich, black Iowa soil.

And as afternoon approached, out of the grey atmosphere, the rains pummeled the thirsty earth as lightening flashed across the sky and there seemed no end to the mighty downpour. It was lovely and dramatic and complete.  The streets overflowed and the plants got a thorough soaking, a long, cool drink after being parched and dehydrated for weeks on end. I thanked God for His rather stark answer to prayer and marveled at my ability to doubt Him.

It was a very welcome surprise to find that yet another pound had taken leave of my body. My clothes are hanging a little looser on my still large frame. I am only eating when I’m truly physiologically hungry and then just until I’m satisfied, which, I’m finding, takes very little food. I’m amazed at the amount of emotional food I had been consuming, eating when I was bored or lonely or frustrated, just for something pleasant to do. Now I go six-to-seven hours between meals quite easily, and in the meantime, my body is burning its fat reserve. I know a good deal when I see it.

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Ladyauthor2b avatar General Stranger

August 06, 2007

Ladyauthor2b

REVIEW QUALITY: 100.0%(1 vote ) personal info reviewer stats
Ladyauthor2b reviewed Version 2 - Read 100%% of the Item

I like the way you spoke about the rain. I love rain, the sound of it, the way it smells in the air before it hits. You painted a nice vision of it coming over the Iowa soil. Then we jump into the way your clothes fits, the way it makes you proud that you are able to withstand not munching all the time. I don’t know how each corelates with the other, but the sentiments are well expressed. I liked this and didn’t see any typos/or grammar that struck me wrong. Although, some of the sentences with the “and”’s in between could either use a semi-colong to separate the two thoughts or just be put into separate sentences. Over using ands can detract from your writing if it’s over done. Just a thought for improvement.

sexysadie77 avatar General Stranger

August 06, 2007

sexysadie77

REVIEW QUALITY: 100.0%(1 vote ) personal info reviewer stats
sexysadie77 reviewed Version 2 - Read 100%% of the Item

Feeding yourself off of the little things in life. What a concept, and one that I will try myself today.  Great view points, and concepts.

ParticoRomulus avatar General Stranger

August 06, 2007

ParticoRomulus Prolific-icon-medium

REVIEW QUALITY: 100.0%(1 vote ) personal info reviewer stats
ParticoRomulus reviewed Version 2 - Read 100%% of the Item

The first two paragraphs are more interesting than the third, though not remarkable.  I find it odd that they are totally unrelated, except that maybe you’re telling the story of a day.  But you’re not really telling a story at all, so it’s hard to know what’s supposed to be engaging here.  I’m glad you’re losing weight, that’s great.  But I don’t particularly care to read about it.  That part seems more appropriate to a blog for close friends.  Who are you writing for?

shahn85 avatar General Stranger

August 06, 2007

shahn85

REVIEW QUALITY: 100.0%(1 vote ) personal info reviewer stats
shahn85 reviewed Version 2 - Read 100%% of the Item

the first line captured me because i had just watched the sunrise on the jersey shore yesterday. but i thought the was a very strong piece. the parched land seemed to reflect your parched/starved body and if God would provide for the land, surely he would not neglect his creation. though times may be hard, there will be suplication. i admire simplicity in people’s writings because it is something i myself strugle with. too many adjectives and superfluous words can ruin a story, but your descriptions are informative as they are honest.

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radar

Age: 54
Loc: Clarion, IA
Gen: F
Last Login: October 25
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