Novel Treatments / Testing the ladder theory part 3

That night as he turned on the computer at home the card still seemed to hum in his pocket.  It was a constant thought, nagging at him all day.  Nothing seemed to replace it.  He glanced at the sheets of inventory he’d meant to enter in the database, but instead found himself on the login page to his email.

A hell yeah went through his mind as he saw her name in his inbox.  He wasted no time clicking on the message and by the end his mind was made up.  Even though it felt like he was risking a deal with Ms. Satan, there was no way he was missing that party.

Gabe,
        Hey sorry about Missy.  She can be a little zealous in her
        Theories.  I’d like to say that she’s not always that way,
        But alas I would be lying.  I sent the theory as an attachment.
        Praying that it won’t be a long fixation as it’s completely
        ridiculous.  So I guess I’ll be seeing you tomorrow night?
        
Rissa

“Some people would rather be certain they are miserable, than risk being happy”

He hesitated as he clicked on reply.  He began to type, but quickly erased it.  He’d started to say something smart-ass about her not losing his email, but was afraid of rocking the boat so to speak.  It’d been six months since he’d ran into her at the bar.  So far it’s the only time he’d seen her outside of the shop, not counting the sidewalk in front of the shop.  Unfortunatly he’d already been six shots past the intoxicated level, yet that night was fresh in his mind.  He’d asked her to dance and an hour later when the bartender called last call they were still dancing.  As they said goodbye he was debating on making a move when she’d reached up and kissed him.  She pulled back so quickly and darted off with a promise to email him about a future gathering.

Rissa, tomorrow night….well I hadn’t decided, but if you’re asking then I’ll be there….the theory is basically bullshit…and I type that without reading it
Gabe

At the last minute Gabe decided to be funny and changed the subject to read, “ Six months later”.  
        
Gabe entered some figures before opening the document Rissa had sent.  The theory was pretty much just as Missy had described it, and it wasn’t long before Gabe found himself closing the document.  He figured he should read it before the dinner, but he couldn’t concentrate.  The card no longer hummed in his pocket, but he felt drawn to check his email every few moments.  Logging back ito his account he began to laugh as he saw Rissa’s new message.  The subject read, “Better late than never????”

Gabe,
        I believe it was Missy’s invitation and to be frank that worries me.  
        Between you and me?  She loves her drama and I’m not sure what
        roles are even being cast, let alone the ones that she wants us to play.  
        Somehow though I think it might be worth it, so let’s pretend I asked.

Rissa

Gabe went to reply, but everything he came up with seemed cheesy and in the end he couldn’t think of anything to say.  She’d actually flirted with him.  Not a lot, but a little.  Shit maybe he was going to have to take Missy up on her offer.  He didn’t like the idea of having to actually befriend Missy, but the benefits would surely outweigh the current situation.  He figured a week or two and he could get past the defensive blockade that Rissa had created.
_{~~~~~~~~~~
As I change the subject on the email to “Better late than never“, I can’t help but laugh.  Part of me feels like a school girl and I hate it, but an overwhelming part of me secretly likes the fact.  I’m torn between sending it or not, my hand frozen so that the cursor hovers over the send button, my finger moving slowly up and down the button.  Jogging through my mind is a rhythmic song of Yes, No and for an instant I can see myself as an eight year old child playing he loves me, he loves me not with a rose.  A sudden shrill of the phone jerks my finger into action and I watch partly amused and a bit horrified as the button is pressed and the message tumbles into the information super highway.}

Picking up my cell I groan seeing that it’s Missy calling.  I think about not answering it, but knowing that she’ll simply call the house phone I answer.

“Yeah?”   I answer the phone briskly hoping she gets the idea I’m busy and thus no time to talk about the theory.

“Is he coming?”  Her voice is breathless.

“What are doing?  You sound like you’re being chased.”  I ask.

“I‘m on the treadmill, is he coming?”  Missy’s voice sounds determined.

“Does it matter,” I ask.

She laughs one of those flirty laughs, “It decides what I wear.”

Instantly I’m caught off guard.  An hour ago she was on the phone telling me about her conversation with Gabe.  She went on for half an hour about how he was going to prove her wrong when it comes to the theory.

“What do you mean?”  I practically bit the words out as I already had a hunch where this was going.  Her voice was a dead give away.

As she giggled again my head shook in what can only be described as a successful attempt from screaming no and I glared at the screen wishing I could take the click back.  One click.

“Well… I was thinking.”  Missy paused as if waiting for me to take the conversation over as I normally do, but I said nothing so she continued, “I mean after Ryan even you said I should try for a different type of guy, right?”

“I didn’t mean Gabe.”  The words slipped out before I could capture them.

“Oh, I mean…you don’t like him do you?”  Missy’s question seemed to hang in the air and I wondered briefly how she missed it.

Not really wanting to get into a conversation with her I asked, “I thought the point of this was so you could prove the theory wrong.”

Missy laughed dropping the questions easily, “No silly!  It’s about me proving him wrong.”

Suddenly I got it. She never had intentions of befriending Gabe, she was just sore over his comment that he wouldn’t sleep with her.

“Missy, I don’t think.”

She cut me off before I had a chance to think about where I was going with my sentence saying, “It doesn’t hurt that he’s got those sexy green eyes.”

I stopped listening at that point.  She continued talking about all the good qualities that Gabe had and how different he was from Ryan.  There was no point in listening.  I’d already figured them out for myself, but she didn’t seem to either notice or care that I was no longer involved in the conversation.  Thirty minutes after I’d sent the email she rang off blissfully unaware that she’d just stabbed me in the back.

I sat there stunned.  Part of me wanted to call her back and tell her that indeed I did like Gabe, but admitting that to her wasn’t something I could bring myself to do.  Besides if she wanted him that badly, she would get him.  Looking at myself in the computer screen I smiled to myself, I knew Missy was more attractive than me.  Her blond hair and blue eyes the fantasy of almost every American male at some point, where’s my brown hair and green eyes were just as plain as can be.  Hell my green eyes weren’t even the green that dances like Gabe’s did, no they were just your plain green.  I’d also give her the flirting skills.  She had men eating out of the palm of her hand, and most times didn’t even have to try, but it was more than that.  I knew from talking to Gabe that indeed he found our conversations interesting, but eventually it would become what all my relationships became.  We’d become great friends.  It’s ironic almost I suppose.  Missy can’t be just friends with a guy and me, well I can’t be anything, but just friends.

Pushing myself away from the desk I called out to Jesse, hoping he wasn’t asleep.  I found him in the living room on the couch, eyes partially closes.  I watched him for a moment, just his presence reassured me.  He lay in complete comfort on the couch, a beer bottle clutched his hand,  his collared shirt unbuttoned and wrinkled, and his feet sprawled on the coffee table in front of him as he watched Sports Center.  I was going to just slip back into my room when he opened his eyes, his dark eyes clouded with sleepiness and concern as he asked, “You okay?”

I smiled back and just shrugged.  I don’t know where the tears came from, I was fine.  Really there was nothing to cry over, but the moment he asked me if I was okay they welled up.  I wiped at them as if I was simply rubbing the sleep from my eyes, “Yeah I’m just going to turn in.”

He sat up immediately, placing the beer bottle on the table as he stood.  Instead of turning toward my room, I turned into his arms.  He hugged me, then pulled back so that he could take in my tear streaked face.  Still crying I laughed as he used his thumb to wipe the tears from my cheek. “Really, I’m okay.”

My voice was actually light and full of laughter as I spoke, which surprised him.  “Yeah because you always just break into tears.”

I shrugged then and broke away from his grasp.  Grabbing a pillow from the couch, I sat Indian style, hugging the pillow to my chest.  “It’s stupid.”

He took his cue from me and sat next to me, watching my every move as if I was going to burst into tears yet again.  “Shoot.”

I glanced away then looked back because I could feel his eyes boring into me.  Sometimes I thought he could really just see inside of me.  There were times when we could converse without words and that frightened me.  As close as we were, I hate being that close to anyone.  Finally I admitted, “It’s girl stuff.”

Jesse’s eyes narrowed slightly, but before I could continue he held up his finger and said, “Just one minute.”

He jumped up and walked briskly to the fridge.  Pulling out three Budweiser’s he head back, opening one and drinking half before he sat down and handed one to me. I watched trying not to laugh, knowing instantly that when I said girl stuff he misinterpreted it to mean female problems in the health domain.

“Jesse.”

He cut me off and said, “We’re roommates you can tell me anything.”

I threw my pillow at him them, catching him completely off guard as it hit him directly in the face.  “A guy problem, dumb ass.”

He was laughing when he reappeared from under the pillow.  “Thank god.  Truly I love ya Rissa, but I don’t know if I could handle talking about.”

“Let’s not go there, “ I suggested.

He nodded and said, “what’s the problem.”

Suddenly I didn’t want to talk about it.  It was so completely foolish, but Jesse had that look that meant he wasn’t going to let me drop it.  For one, he honestly wanted to help me, I rarely asked him for help and I knew it bothered him, but more importantly I’d raised his interest with the mention of a guy. Jesse hated not being in the know how and to stop now would only start him on a fact finding mission.  Still I tried,”There’s no problem, I was just being silly.”

“Uh unt,” Jesse shook his head and leaned forward, “Not getting off that easy.”  

I swear there must have been something wrong with me.  Maybe my hormone levels were out of wack or something, but one look into his eyes and again I could feel the tears.  The story just came out then.  I told him about Gabe, not a lot, just the important parts, and the fact that Missy was now after him.  I told him about the theory and how Missy thought I had a thing for him, but when really it was Gabe.  He remained silent, occasionally nodding his head almost as if he was afraid to speak in fear I might stop, “And I guess that’s why I’m upset.  I mean I know it’s stupid, I’ve had every chance to talk to him before this and didn’t.”

I stopped then, exhausted as I sat back in the chair curling my feet underneath me.  “Would you stop staring at me and say something?”

“I can’t believe you haven’t said anything before this.”  Jesse paused for a moment then asked, “The coffeehouse guy right?”

I specifically hadn’t mentioned Gabe’s name or occupation so I was a bit surprised, “How’d you know?”

Jesse shrugged, “It makes sense when I think about it.”

“It does”, I asked in hopes of getting him to expand.

“Yeah, he’s an interesting guy.  You know he gave up a partnership in some fancy dancy law firm to start up that place?”
I groaned, I should have known that Jesse would have known him.  Though he’d just moved to town, Jesse knew everyone.  “How’d you know?”  I was almost afraid to ask, but curiosity always wins out with me.

“We chatted that day you had me meet you for lunch and then I ran into him at the bar.”  Jesse laughed and looked at me as if I was guilty as he said, “the poor guy was waiting around to see if some girl was coming in.  Apparently she kissed him and ran off.  The bartender didn’t know her though.”

“Shut up he did not say that.” Annoyance crept in my voice.

“So it was you.”  Jesse smiled knowing as well as I that he wasn’t getting a confession.  So instead he offered his advice, “So just tell her.”

“Tell Missy?”  I stared at him, my mouth open in shock.  Had he not just listened to the entire conversation.  “I can’t tell her.”

“Why not?”  He seemed confused as he asked the question and suddenly I didn’t have a clear cut answer.  I mean why not?

So I just shrugged and answered, “It’s just not me, you know?”

Jesse nodded and said, “Yeah it’s just not you.”

He looked preoccupied with something, but suddenly the lateness of the night hit me and I just wanted to sleep.  Smoothering a yawn with the back of my hand I stretched and said, “Thanks for listening.”

He nodded and asked, “And they’ll both be at dinner tomorrow?”

My eyes narrowed at his question.  The little wheels were turning in that head, I was sure of that, so I made him promise, “Jesse, you’re not to say or do anything tomorrow at that party.”

“What I’m suppose to act like a mime that doesn’t have a routine?” He looked back at me smiling as if he was innocent which made me even more afraid.  Jesse is a lot of things, but the innocent look only comes out when he’s knee deep in mud.  

“Jesse!”  It amazed me how motherly my voice could sound at moments like these, but it always did the trick.

He held up his hands as if to show that he didn’t have weapons, “Okay, Okay, I won’t do or say anything about the subject during the party.”

I said nothing as I moved to exit the room.  I could hear him laugh as I walked back into my room.  There I was laying on my bed, tired, but unable to fall asleep when his footsteps paused outside my door.  Opening it just enough to stick his head in he asked, “How many sheep have you counted?”

“1,246”  I answered tiredly.

He smiled at me, “It’ll be okay, you know that right?”

I smiled back weakly, “I know. I’m not really that upset.

“Liar.”  He walked in then and sat on my bed.  “I kinda like the idea.”

“Of me being upset?” I was too tired to get offended, but I was curious.

“I meant of you liking Gabe, but I guess it’s the same thing.”  He paused, “Ever since…..” He didn’t say Scott’s name, skipping the obvious he continued, “you shut people out.”

I started to object, but he placed his finger over my lips in a hushing gesture.  “Even me.”  He looked hurt when he said it and I felt bad.

“Jesse, I’m sorry.”  I reached for his hand, gathering his finger in mine, and he squeezed it in reassurance.  

“It’s okay, I just worry about you.”

“I’m fine.  I promise.”  

He glanced at me and smiled, but it was weak as if he didn’t believe what he was saying, “I know kid, I know.”

He bent down and kissed me lightly on my forehead.  He whispered softly, “Just trust me on this, it’ll be okay.”

Our eyes met briefly and the determination in his scared me a bit, but I did trust him.  I trusted him more than I ever have anyone so I let go of the fear and said okay.  He left soon after and it wasn’t long before the only thing I was studying was the back of my eye lids.

_{~~~~~~~~~~~~~~}~

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