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Lyrics / You've Lost It

Tears weep from those solemn eyes,
A lost hope lays dormant in desolate cries,
Your soul is burning as you smell the smoke,
Digging for truth from the words you spoke.

And now you’ve lost it,
What it was that made you whole.
You’ve lost it,
The hunger now haunts your soul.
You’ve lost it,
Now everything makes you sad;
Because you’ve lost it,
You’ve lost all you ever had.

The monster grows inside your numb, brittle frame,
Knowing deep inside you will never be the same.
Watching the reflection in the mirror grow dark,
The emptiness consumes your shattered heart.

And now you’ve lost it,
What it was that made you whole.
You’ve lost it,
The hunger now haunts your soul.
You’ve lost it,
Now everything makes you sad;
Because you’ve lost it,
You’ve lost all you ever had.

Now it is gone, it is just too bad,
That you’ve lost all you ever had…

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ixam_ avatar General Stranger

May 28, 2006

ixam_

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ixam_ reviewed Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item
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sherrylynne avatar General Stranger

October 03, 2005

sherrylynne

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sherrylynne reviewed Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item
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EmmaT avatar General Stranger

October 03, 2005

EmmaT

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Death_Mask avatar General Stranger

October 03, 2005

Death_Mask

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JRJunior avatar General Stranger

October 01, 2005

JRJunior

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Cludge avatar General Stranger

October 01, 2005

Cludge

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foursixquebec avatar General Stranger

September 29, 2005

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kingofmyexcuses avatar General Stranger

September 29, 2005

kingofmyexcuses

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kingofmyexcuses reviewed Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item

I like the imagery,it’s reminiscent of my favorite bands and you keep a good rhythm throughout the song. I did have a little trouble finding a good tempo to pair these lyrics to, but I’m not a drummer so it’s not a major issue. I could see this being a good fill song on a rock LP. Good job.

boltie avatar General Stranger

September 28, 2005

boltie

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boltie reviewed Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item

I think the refrain is excellent for a song--its rythm and ryhme is appropriately both rapid and steady.  i would say, however, that the verses are a bit too wordy for a song--perhaps, as I have suggested to others who write lyrics—try to create more active verses, instead of descriptive ones.   i know that sounds counter-intuitive, but the best songs have real-life examples in them.  Think (although this example is kind of outdated and a tad embarassing) Alanis Morisette’s “Ironic”.

Deleted User avatar

September 28, 2005

Deleted User

Review of Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item

Really nice.  Although I usually write lyrics that are brighter, I also enjoy a good darker one once in a while.  The one negative I have is watch the flow.  Keep it up.

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BrokenMisery

Age: 19
Loc: -
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Last Login: April 20
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Version 1
Latest Activity: over 2 years ago

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