Poetry / Waters of the Moon

This is my favourite poem so far, simply because I enjoy reading it regularly!

I was thinking that this poem would make a good prayer for soldiers off to war or in a fight of some kind. I really like the poem. I might slip by and read some more of your work. Good job.

the wording was very nice, but I don’t quite understand where you are going with it.

Lovely rhythm & rhyme of course, except for the last rhyming couplet.  I thought perhaps the third last line might be altered to something like “To you our lives we render”... or something :D

I liked this piece very much, however, some of your lines seemed all too generic. Try using a little more imagery perhaps to paint a picture for your reader.

Although I’m not normally a fan of rhyming poetry this is done really well.  The rhythm and flow are executed with precision and grace.  Great job.

This creative work discourses
satisfyingly upon Man’s tendency to long for what is inherently human.  It invokes
and pays tribute to more archaic lyric poetry. The skilled melding of the traditional poetic form and images
that manage to be at once vivid and delicate, paints a stark picture of
a more traditional type of poetry. It is not lengthy but one of my favorite poems of the week!The titular character explores the depths of his inner self and doing so he leaves the scene haunted, and so do we.  Great Work!

Awesome, wonderful, excellent! This was very good. I loved the tempo! For such a short piece, you packed a lot of power. Great piece of poetic art. I loved it!

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June 14, 2006

by Thirdsqurl

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This poem is inspired by Alamo mythology where William Barrett Travis is said to have drawn a line in the sand.  Those who crossed the line would be giving their lives for freedom (which they did when the Alamo fell a few days later).  Of the 186 men defending the Alamo, there were no survivors.

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