Poetry / this backroad will be the death of me

coffee rings
pattern the table
we dine as lost souls
stopped at roadside restaurants
sloppy
we didn’t know where to begin
wandering on backroads
another secluded town
in the middle
of nowhere

it’s time to fly
grow wings
flutter life away
you know it will always be this way
i can tell
i can tell with every non existant person i see
we will be here
until the end
until it takes our last breath away
the end is near
its here

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Reviews

February 26, 2006

ataraxy

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
37	100.0% (5 votes)	45.2%

personal info reviewer stats

Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
20	F	Saint Paul, MN	June 20

ataraxy reviewed Version 1 - Read 100%% of the Item

I like the images you create, and the way you let the poem progress because there is a very subtle beginning-to-end chronology to it which makes it attractive to me.
The format was good for this poem (i.e. the way you broke lines and stanzas) and there’s an almost romantic tone to it which suits it very well. I thought of this as almost dreamlike, because it’s got scattered images and nothing is too clearly defined, which is beautiful.
God job on this; I hope to see more like it in the future.