Non-fiction / Why Men Need Crossbars and Women Don't.

Men, admittedly not this one but I'm stereotyping (as opposed to monotyping, which I do when I'm smoking), are addicted to danger. Obvoiously a crossbar is about as dangerous as yakult. But if you run a red because you're late for class and end up spending double latin with matron's freshest icepack slowly melting though your slacks, you realise testing one's mettle on a bike requires and threatens the most grotesquely swollen cojones. At the same time the structural advantages of a crossbar are prequisites for withstanding the stresses and strains of a man's ride. So the crossbar holds a metaphoric significance for men. It's yang form holds our entire ride together. Lapse in respect but for an instant and we atrophy the disseminatory potential of our precious little yins forever. In one shaft may we see ourselves and all men. Can't think why this precludes women from the conversation but hell, I tried. j

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