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Criticism / What's wrong with everything today!
What's wrong with everything today...
Everything is backwards, senseless and operates with no apparent rationale. And for this I will suffer more than I deserve.
You see, I have enjoyed success most of my life, and yet never uttered a condescending word to anyone. I loved life and I loved the people in it. I worked hard to achieve personal goals, but never at the expense of another person's feelings or well being. I wanted to be better than me, not you.
I spent countless hours over several years practicing absolute loyalty to my chosen profession. I was a criminal investigator, more specifically, a homicide detective. I would eventually get promoted and supervise the new generation of detectives. I loved what I did, and I loved what they did. My only requirement as a supervisor was that my detectives treated every investigation the same way they would want one conducted on their own behalf. Life was good, life wasn't all that hard, and the money was great.
As I entered into my first and only divorce, I was not prepared for what was to come next. In short, the same system I had dedicated my entire life to ripped every shred of credible evidence that the judicial system was fair from my very soul. I couldn't believe what had happened. They took everything, to include things I didn't even have! I would oversome that obstacle though. It didn't compromise my own integrity, and I was able to push forward as a productive member of society.
Four months after my 41st birthday I would end up in the hospital. it was unimaginable to me the reason I was there. I was a well conditioned 41 year old with good eating habits who had just suffered the first of three heart attacks. Ultimately they would cost me my career. The Attorney General's Office in my state prohibits continued police service while taking any type of blood thinners. And unforunately for me I was to be on them for the rest of my life.
It has been over 5 months since my resignation and I am still awaiting an approval on my disability pension. It is a reduced pension, where application was made based exclusively on a government defined disability. Yet, I have heard nothing. Here's where it gets good...
I spent 20 years (in some cases against my will) paying into social programs I never had any intentions of using for myself...But life is funny and I found myself in a very financially desperate condition. So I made application for some temporary assistance to avoid losing my home. in a nutshell, here is the answer I got almost across the board.
"Our decisions are based on a variety of factors, one of which is your last W-2 form. As it stands you make too much money for our program". I replied with "I don't make ANY money now"!
The solution is I wait until next year when I can show I made nothing (Of course I will be dead by then from a lack of food and shelter). It would seem I could not make a rational argument against an irrational system.
My ex then took me back to court because she wasn't getting her money anymore. I petitioned the court for a reduction in support and alimony based EXCLUSIVELY on the fact I was now disabled and unemployed. I probably don't need to tell you that my motion was denied. In my state that motion is supposed to be evaluated on a simple standard. Was there a significant change in circumstances that should warrant an amendment to the order?
In my case the answer was clearly yes, but yet the motion was denied.
What world am I living in? What else isn't as it seems. There is so much more to this story, but I will leave it for another time...
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