This is meant to be a “doom metal” sort of thing. Optimism doesn’t work too well in it…but I’ll try out some things and see if it can work out. Thanks for the suggestion.
Lyrics / End of an Empire
[Verse One]
Pillared buildings
Washed in white
Display wisdom,
Good, and rights.
Meanwhile, in the streets,
Rust and filth arise.
Green's a foreign color
In the children's eyes.
[Chorus]
This is the end of an empire,
And it's coming fast.
This is the end of a short run;
The glory days have passed.
[Verse Two]
Black-robed figures
Patrol rooftops,
Leaders sheltered
Behind caltrops.
We're advised not to fear,
But it's all the seers sell.
If we don't heed their guidance,
We’re waited for in Hell.
[Bridge]
Fortunes fall with the hopes of people
Who work for honest pay.
They can only watch, voiceless
Punished for their honest ways.
[Instrumental Break]
[Extended Chorus]
This is the end of an empire,
And it’s coming fast.
This is the end of a short run;
Our glory days have passed.
This is the end of an empire,
And yet, we stay in line.
We wait while doom unfolds:
Was there a reason to the rhyme?
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Tak3thechanc3 reviewed Version 1 -
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I love the allegory of an empire to the Bush administration. I also like your chorus, especially the ending of the extended chorus, it made me read the lyrics again.
The stanza:
Though advised not to fear,
It’s all the seers sell.
If we don’t heed their guidance,
We’re waited for in Hell.
These lines just pop out in the song, Bush preached about not fearing and taking the war to the terrorist. The only thing that needs to be changed is the first word, Though, it doesn’t really make sense because there is no clause that rightly fallows.
Great job, I look forward to reading your other work!
-Walker
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casimirpulaski reviewed Version 1 -
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i like this, it is a shame the melody can’t be uploaded. this is a very concise way of putting the last 8 years (and then some) i like that you didn’t go into the political specifics, thereby dating the piece. i wonder if you couldn’t add a reprise or verse to reflect the hopes of present times under a new leader? a new way? a new order?
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