Non-fiction / Write On!

You say a lot in just six words.  I like.  I had to read it a couple of times to get it, but “no matter”.  Bonus points for the rhyme and two-word sentence symmetry.

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July 28, 2008

by trident

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48	M	Birmingham, AL	November 09

thanks! that’s a great compliment.

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i read ur peace….i havent ever read one like it…it was very differenet and alittle uncle to mean didnt make much sense in a way.

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July 24, 2008

by alexianx

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...what?

July 25, 2008

by Blue_Eyes

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33	M	Weedsport, NY	November 15

Allow me to translate:

“I read your piece. I have never read one like it. It was very different and a little unclear to me, and did not make much sense (in a way).

July 27, 2008

by trident

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48	M	Birmingham, AL	November 09

;-) My lips are sealed.

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Nice picture you paint, for if one were consumed by the pianist you would not notice the coin. Nice one! Good luck.

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July 26, 2008

by trident

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48	M	Birmingham, AL	November 09

Wow! I’m impressed with your vision – I think you’ve added to this immensely, and it just goes to show that a 6-word story is only as vibrant as the mind of the reader.
Cheers!

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It lacks clarity, at least to me. Penny drops is meant to be representation of not making much money as a writer? That’s the closest I can decipher it and even then it’s obscure.

This is very different…it has a unique flavor to it, and that adds to it. The word choices make the reader question what it may be about, and that gives the piece strength. The staccato punctuation of the period usage is extremely effective, as well.

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July 26, 2008

by trident

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86	79.2% (53 votes)	26.0%

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48	M	Birmingham, AL	November 09

Thanks – usually (to quote a line from my favorite movie) “the nail that sticks up get’s hammered”. I’m pleased to note there are quite a few exceptions on this site.

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hi there,

something tells me you write lyrics for songs/which i do too, and have dropped things on my keyboard/but i stink anyway, so it don’t matter..the matter/clatter ryhme also is clever..(another clue of a songwriter..:)..nice one, jim

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July 26, 2008

by trident

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48	M	Birmingham, AL	November 09

Hi Jim,
Thanks. That’s a great interpretation. I’m actually a bit afraid of poetry, and am not sure where to start with lyrics, but I’m keen to give it a go. Gimme some pointers!

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Unsure about your goals for this as “non-fiction.” However, I do like your word choice. All these words are crisp and pointed. I’ll check out your longer pieces.

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July 28, 2008

by trident

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48	M	Birmingham, AL	November 09

I assure you this is my life story. ;-)

July 28, 2008

by trident

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48	M	Birmingham, AL	November 09

BTW – I just uploaded my first short story. I hope you have a chance to check it out.

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it sounds like you are intensely focused when writing, nice.

My immediate reaction was that it reminded me of Dorothy Parker.

This is a humorous little piece but falls short of a memoir.  It doesn’t tell me much about your life, your attitude, or your emotions!  I think you’ve got talent for telling something amusing in six words but this isn’t really a memoir in my opinion.  Good luck!