“Transcendent” is kind of a foggy word. I think New-Agers like it more than almost anyone else. I’ll think about replacing it with something more specific. Thanks.
Journalism / Press Release - Little Woods by Steve Campbell (Analysis)
Elk Grove Village, Illinois, 5/5/2008
Publisher iUniverse, Inc., the leading provider of publishing technology solutions for authors, announces the release and Publisher’s Choice designation of Little Woods by Steve Campbell. Little Woods is an action novel set in the Chicago area that follows the story of Native Americans, in the year 1833, amidst the aftermath of the Black Hawk War, the official incorporation of Chicago as an American town, and the forfeiture of native land rights through the Treaty of Chicago. The historical drama is set off against the misadventures of a 21st-century family walking the same ground and also coping with the upheavals imposed by an encroaching world.
Steve Campbell explains, “Little Woods will provide readers with entertainment, a bit of information about Illinois history, a connection to the transcendence of the prairie, and the message that globalization is real, irreversible, and a test of every individual’s flexibility in adapting to a new reality.”
About the Author: Steve Campbell is a U.S. Navy veteran from the suburbs of Chicago who has eight years of experience managing projects in the civilian software services industry. He has an MBA in technology management from the University of Phoenix.
About Little Woods: The fate of two culturally diverse families living in different eras of Illinois history merge in Little Woods, a gripping tale of globalization’s disturbing effect on the present and the past that offers a sobering view of our future. Little Woods (ISBN: 0-595-71260-6, ISBN-13: 9780595712601, Published April 2008) can be ordered through any Barnes & Noble bookstore, BarnesandNoble.com, iUniverse.com, and Amazon.com.
About iUniverse: iUniverse offers a variety of publishing services to help individuals publish, market, and sell fiction, poetry and nonfiction books. The company utilizes print-on-demand technology, and is one of the largest self-publishing companies in the United States, publishing more than 5,000 new titles each year. The iUniverse management team has extensive editorial and managerial experience with traditional publishers such as HarperCollins, Putnam, Simon & Schuster and Holtzbrinck. iUniverse partners with industry leading author organizations, including the Authors Guild, the Harlem Writers Guild, and the American Society of Journalists and Authors (ASJA) to bring innovative programs to their members. iUniverse has strategic alliances with Barnes & Noble, Inc. in the U.S. and Chapters Indigo in Canada and has offices in New York City, Shanghai and Lincoln, Neb. For more information, please visit www.iuniverse.com or call 1-800-AUTHORS.
Media Contact: Steve Campbell, stevecampbell@avicorcho.com
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draculachronicles reviewed Version 2 -
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Well the article covers a lot, but looks to me more of an advert for iUniverse than an attempt to promote Steve Campbell’s book. The book sounds interesting to me and I’d have liked to know some more about it as opposed to hearing where the editorial staff at iUniverse gained their experience.
The book would interest me and looks very good on the surface. I wonder why Steve Campbell didn’t hold out for a contract with a mainstream publishing house, as opposed to iUniverse who, in truth, are more of a vanity publisher the same as Author House here in the UK.
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JoysofRevolution reviewed Version 2 -
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It would be better with a strong lead and maybe a little more input about what might be ahead in the novel instead of saying it’s a transcendent experience. Its clarity is definitely there though, so no worries on that issue.
dolphine32781 reviewed Version 2 -
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I liked how you gave background information.
Stargate reviewed Version 2 -
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The writing is generally clear and suited to a Press Release. I might suggest a few editorial changes for clarity and to tighten sentence structure:
Publisher iUniverse, Inc., the leading provider of publishing technology solutions for authors, lauds with its prestigious Publisher’s Choice Award, the release of Little Woods by Steve Campbell. Little Woods is an action novel set in the Chicago area in 1833. The story follows Native Americans in the aftermath of the Black Hawk War whence ensued the official incorporation of Chicago as an American town, and the life-changing forfeiture of Native land rights in the Treaty of Chicago.
Also, in About the Author, I would suggest dropping the “of” before “experience”. You might want to consider changing “He has” an MBA to he holds an MBA in . . .
In the section, About Little Woods, I would split the first sentence. Try a period after Mmerge in Little Woods.” Next sentence would begin “It is a gripping tale . .
You might also, for clarity, insert “the reader” after ”. . . and the past that offerers the reader a sobering view of our future.
We all have different styles, so you might find my suggestions unsuitable. I usually try for an economy of words and breaking sentences in which the reader might get lost. Keep at it. Good work.
Stargate
kadiya reviewed Version 2 -
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Whilst the overall pitch is complete, the first paragraph left me mentally exhausted. I think you should try rephrasing the second sentence. For example
You wrote:
Little Woods is an action novel set in the Chicago area that follows the story of Native Americans, in the year 1833, amidst the aftermath of the Black Hawk War, the official incorporation of Chicago as an American town, and the forfeiture of native land rights through the Treaty of Chicago.
Perhaps it may sound better thus:
New paragraph.
Set in Chicago, year 1833, the action novel ‘Little Woods’ follows the story of native Americans amidst the aftermath of the Black Hawk War. It explores the official incorporation of Chicago as an American town and forfeiture of native land rights through the reaty of Chicago.
Just an idea, it’s not as long winded. Aside from that its is a good press release.
TSTARRR reviewed Version 2 -
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Steve Campbell explains, “Little Woods will provide readers with entertainment, a bit of information about Illinois history, a connection to the transcendence of the prairie, and the message that globalization is real, irreversible, and a test of every individual’s flexibility in adapting to a new reality.”
I did not like the way the paragraph read. I felt that the explanation was too wordy. It felt like you were saying and and and and then…
The topic of the book is not something that I would normally read, however since the authur is a military veteran, I will go and check out the book.
Chago reviewed Version 2 -
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I have expeirences writing press releases. In your first lines you say that the Publisher “announces” release. The item is a announcment so you would not have to say it in the statement. I would also try to eliminate the use of the word “Publish.” Shorten the line up and make it less broken up in many ideas.
Be specific.
You do not have say “the year,” just type the year it will be understood. You first two lines are very long and can lose the reader. Shorten them and combine ideas.
Example for your second line: “Little Woods is an action novel that follows the story of Native Americans amidst the aftermath of the Black Hawk War in 1833 in the Chicago area. The official incorporation of Chicago as an American town, and the forfeiture of native land rights through the Treaty of Chicago.”
The second graph can be changed to paraphrase. You do not have to use “explains” either. It would be “explained” because it is a past tense line anyway. This section is trying to give the idea of the work, the same as the first section. No need to say the same thing twice. Moreover, you then have a third section to do the same thing again. Combine all three sections and make everything more specific.
The last line, cut out “For more information” and change it to “for information.” People that will go to the info will be looking for MORE INFO so they know what is expected, MORE INFO.
Overall you can combine and tighten up the write up. To much repeating and somewhat wordy. I am around to help if you want. Good luck
paulfogarty reviewed Version 2 -
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Ok. The opening line for you press release, and the title should derive from it or point to it as well, is this: ”...a gripping tale of globalization’s disturbing effect on the present and the past that offers a sobering view of our future…” Not exactly as written but this line contains the hook of the press release. You need to tidy that up as a first sentence and then it will be easier to fill in the details in a more sparse, direct, and active kind of way.
As your press release reads… the main point is that Publishers iUniverse is releasing a book. Go with the key point of interest, uniqueness, of your book and work a catchy title for your press release around the title of your book.
All easier said than done, I know. Hope this helps. Also cut back on any redundancies or any words you don’t absolutely need.
poopers reviewed Version 2 -
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Hi Steve,
My first reaction was, ‘where do I start?’ I wasn’t really sure what was important to read and I was not pulled in by the story. Page 1 is wordy and not very exciting. I would like to see the main issue/problem in a just a few words while enticing me at the same time.
lilianwt reviewed Version 2 -
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I think is very good in general, although I want to see more information. Why a bit of history and in which way you equate cultural challenges like immigration with globalization. They have some elements in common, but they are different social forces / events. If you want to relate them, you need to elaborate more on your personal perspective, even in a press release
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