Poetry / only fearful (Analysis)

my life as a cloud
airborn
only fearful
of towering mountains
my life as a mountain
earthborn
olny fearful
of relentless waves
my life as a wave
waterborn
only fearful
of thoughtless men
my life as a man
only fearful
of air
earth
and water

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Reviews

April 29, 2008

Ramblin_Jack

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
52	63.1% (65 votes)	18.1%

personal info reviewer stats

Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
22	M	Ireland	November 09

Ramblin_Jack reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item

i liked it its well written and flows very nicely. one minor quibble would be to insert a space between each verse that starts with my life as… other than that its good

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April 27, 2008

CharlesB

No. of Reviews	Overall Quality	Comment Followup
233	79.0% (138 votes)	0.0%

personal info reviewer stats

Age	Gender	Location	Last Login
22	M	Wheat Ridge, CO	October 30

CharlesB reviewed Version 1 - Read 100% of the Item

This is a great poem. The way you end it, using the beginning verse was done well. If you seperate it into stansas it might help out with the flow. Other than that I felt it was excellent. Good work, Keep it up.