I find that this format embodies spoken word for me.. The separation of lines in typical format just doesnt flow as well.. Flow being the integral word.. I like the way everything looks connected this way.. I can also designate how long my pauses will be by the amount of periods I use.
What puzzled you about it? I tried to make the premise very obvious
Poetry / Finding Frequencies (Analysis)
There are times I find my mind in a daze for days.. when a tune has infected my sections with a melodious maze of shifting scores and sounds that replay exactly what he or she who shaped said symphony.. intended it to be.. Theres no ending it for me.. Constantly seeking new frequencies to freak with these in depth perceptions of what music is supposed to be.. just know its not a joke to me.. from the slow floating notes toting flows that tend to grab my attention..To the fast crashing boom bap smashing raps that result in releasing tension.. Including all rhythmic divisions in dimensions that i have failed to mention.. this is just a section of the tones my ears have grown to hear.. to limit myself would be a tragedy.. a fallacy that would gradually render me to be a sad sight to see.. And so i propose a toast to those with the capacity to compose masterpieces.. Those who evoke mass releasing of movement.. the kind that makes ones spine shift.. makes my design twist as I witness the pumping of the fists.. the moves.. the shaking of the hips.. the groove.. creation of the rifts.. it soothes my core… slowly drains away all distractions till there is no more left but me.. and the beat.
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wulfenstraat reviewed Version 1 -
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Amazing. I write long critiques when i find something good which could have been done better. I’m writing a short critique because this couldn’t be better. It’s majestic. A triumph of words over a feeling. Poetic. Imaginative. Impressive.
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cooljim102055 reviewed Version 1 -
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hi there,
well done, in conveying your feelings on writing,,,i wish you the best of luck and success,,,usually people who have something become a way of life for them as it seems to be for you eventually are successful,,,later, jim
poetking reviewed Version 1 -
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i liked this, but a suggestion on making it more compact on spacing. it would portray itself much better
greenbabe13 reviewed Version 1 -
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This is a very interesting piece and i like that it’s very mysterious and puzzling. I just have one question… why the format?
gariverse reviewed Version 1 -
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Although your words are merely black and white, i can see their colour, they are out of sight.
And though they are silent, a find as i read, i am listening, and i swear that i can hear your words…sing.
Marvellous.
perfct2u reviewed Version 1 -
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This “spoken word” piece flows very quickly. You chose your prose well and your phrases transition into the next section well. Good.
earthvirgo reviewed Version 1 -
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I liked it. I would have ended it at “till there is no more.”
I particularly liked boom bap… to tension….up to mention. Limit myself tragedy..fallacy. Very nice.
Keep up the good work. Have you considered also submitting this in “lyrics.”
Thanks for letting us know it is to be read, that was absolutely imperative.
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