So very interesting and original. Wow. This is bait--this feels like the beginning of a fantastic novel. "I inspect the alien corpse for the tell-tale talisman. Useless to humans, I smash it on the ground." This line suggests the egocentric human--what if this could be the cure for anything, everything that ails us? This has so many possibilities to go on and on. The imagery was spot-on. Well written! McKinley

This poem feels like a story--a memory so effectively, casually told. A perfect example of how the most simple objects and events forever become a part of us. I believe each of us has a "pink pig pez dispenser" in our lives. This is so charming; it has a bittersweetness to it. Your descriptions are effortless, and I saw every single line. Delightful. McKinley

This is a wonderful peek inside somone's head. The inner dialogue is great. The imagery is very effective--the tastes and textures. You also used color very well. Aside from the more technical aspects, it's just a great read. It leaves me wanting more. "My thirst emptied the carton. Damn it. I can't. The urge. I hated how it made the air inside my chest thick, heavier. The uncertainty would never leave me. I must." I sense addiction, and obsessive/compulsion. Very good depth is created with s...

I don't know if you're breaking out or breaking in...perhaps it's your birth--your reward for needing, wanting. Are you creating or dismantling? Are you dropping into an ancient place--treasured--like Pompeii? Is it a journey taken in dreams or just in your mind? Are you down, looking up? Up, looking down? No matter, because you lead the reader through as a jet bursts through the clouds. There's a disorientation as the reader travels through the barriers with you to the place... Once there, t...

So you've told the secret to appreciating the written word...are people listening? I see a theme--properly arranged words (poetry)--are like a drug if applied to the senses correctly. But the description of the effect the poetry should have is raw and physical. How refreshing. A hint of how you might feel, what you might see should be enough for every person who is intimidated by poetry to brave it. This work has a function outside of being a pleasure for the mind--it's a set of directions fo...

This is a very bleak, realistic vision of letting go of life. The rhythm is excellent--I feel the blood draining...the darkness taking over. Your work is very sincere and effective...an excellent job. Perhaps let the last two lines stand alone--they are the saddest...the end. Standing alone, they may get your point across even stronger. You are talented. Keep writing, McKinley

18 and life to go...that's an 80's song you're probably too young to know. I'm amazed at your talent. They tell me in the review rules here that I have to mention things that need "improvement" in a work. The only question I have is, Is the "I" in the poem art as well, or is "she" alone the art. Now, let me tell you how amazing this is. The story of it is so vivid to me. "Her feet are stones in a tin can" --that image alone is worth the whole read, but this is stocked full of so much beauty. ...

Every word in this work is used purposefully--no waste--crafted expertly. More than that, the meaning is so human. There are fingerprints all over this--spoken by a voice who knows. Excellent poetry! McKinley

This one hurts. So much communication in so few carefully placed words and feelings. Wonderful revelation of the human dilema...needing, but not receiving. McKinley