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AGE:
19
LOC: Coeur D Alene, ID
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: October 15
LOC: Coeur D Alene, ID
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: October 15
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Version 1
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“We don’t need her,” a voice boomed. “The child is useless, even for a girl she is no use for this family. Men are supposed to be in charge here, and I cant expect her to do anything if something were to happen to me.” By the deep tone of his voice it was apparent this was the girls father, for no one else would speak such words about the daughter in front of this group leader. He was aloud to speak how he wished in front of his colleagues in hopes to find a suitable answer to his so called p...
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First, it was a very well done poem but... you had a few spelling mistakes and I think you should look it over again. I always have favored emotional types, and this one rather captured my attention, it's beautifully executed.
I can just barely see what you are getting at with this poem, but I do feel the strength of emotion busily humming in it. This is descriptive as well, it is rather easy to visualize movements and sights in my opinion, but as I've learned dont do that too much.
It's very visual, and the clarity is well done. Your flow of words and rhyming scheme at specific lines, gave off a very calm sense of being. This piece was very well written in a poetic short story term, I hope you continue in writing such types as this.
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