You have a strong mind, seems you must support it with thoughts of love . you generate inspirations , that should be taught to the youth of this perplexed nation that you and I call home. I reckon we do have to "think" we can think of the experience that taught us how to love .. this memoir would be complete if placed on cover of school books your friend Lookingbeyond ...

if one of the big drawings was having a good old fashion cb radio ,, I would have to give you a hearty 10/4 one this one ,,, no kidding this is pretty good ok,, your friend lookingbeyond

overall I feel you did well ,, however maybe when posting on urbis you might want to drop the shortcuts you know where you insert the brakets ( ) It is a very iron clad door at the music hall in Nashville ascap records alone has over five million submissions to make it these days your lyric has to be air tight .. keep writing you have covered your first base extremely well lookingbeyond

Hey Cooljim , nother good one here, I like the sunrise sunset in the brige, this would be very good song with piano keys marching along ,, take care Lookingbeyond

like how you used the words jipped and clipped in chorus. done good job on the rhyme .. keep trucking lookingbeyond ..

very good ,, solid ryhme with clover and over ,, I thought this was very clever, you need to get a book of these together Lookingbeyond .

you dont need to make this any better , if you tried you would mess it up . leave it be, keep the snails and wigs , close to the roasted pigs, I mean it .. Lookingbeyond

I like this , if it were mine i would repeat your last verse a few times use it as a chorus

It would be a nice one to submit to fleetwood mac .. i like this a lot I like your ryhme here .. I'm gonna break free I'm gonna succeed I'm gonna find whatever it is I need You have very strong potential .

sounds like something from old england ,, back from yesteryear keep going with it ..