and i break a little more when i see another dawn yeah i take a little more when i need to get along but with all i am shouldering i recognize what is torn when a life left to moldering is the face of what's scorn yeah i sigh a little more when i see it in their eyes i get high a little more when i start to realize all the things i am shouldering just seem to leave me forlorn breaking is what the holder brings and the chase has left me worn i get down a little more but just a once in a while ...
grand 1000 stars in empty skies 1000 lies with alibis 1000 cries and no surprise i see Her when i close my eyes when sleep does come 1000 dreams of visions past 1000 screams 1000 slips and so it seems i lost the end that fit the means swimming in 1000 thoughts 1000 other feelings fought 1000 paths that lead to lost 1000 ways to pay the cost always knowing when I wake 1000 dawns to days that break 1000 shades of bellyache and memories of my mistake 13 youth it was a time like none before a tim...
I enjoyed it. Had a nice hook and sped along pretty well. Definitely has the reader pulled in. I would like to see where the story ends up, so you have definitely mastered the first step to writing a great novel.
Overall a good little ditty, but I was confused... the episode of good times, or an episode of Good Times? Episode. Seems like a siezure or something. db