Jeeze, this one is funny! "This is not the way America is about.â You really captured the essence of the dialect. Prof. Gayle is brilliant.

HA! This evoked fond memories, what little I can remember. Especially "The Rap." Problem was, my Rap was in Serbo-Croation. This could go verbatim into FHM magazine.

Lovely. Just lovely. You even threw in a rhyme; not required but a nice touch.

Sad, of course. I think it was very effective to use "Don't" to start each stanza. It echos anyone's reaction when they hear bad news; "no, no, no, no..." The line "only to strike with a closed fist" implies physical violence, which the description doesn't mention. If there was none, consider re-writing this to lead the reader more toward feeling a loss of or now loathing for physical intimacy with a betrayer.

"I wished upon a big white star." Damned Texaco....

This would NEVER happen to a lovely young lass from Nantucket.

I like stream of consciousness narrative, but there are a lot of things in here that look more like errors in spelling and grammar: "...for all them to see me...." "...dreaming way wishing they were me?my head hurts...." Unless you are being wildly experimental, they make it hard to follow. I exclude the lower-case "i" because I really do think that was done on purpose and I have no problem with it. The idea of hands that can never be cleaned is interesting and clever. A metaphor worth pursui...

Short, bittersweet and evocative.

The simple rhyme scheme makes it very song-like. "So that I can feel your shoulder "beneath my face… Sweet imagery.

An interesting essay on an interesting and important subject. It generally lays out its thesis well, in logical progression. One bit of advice: The paragraph is your friend. No matter how well written it may be, a single big block of text without breaks is hard on the reader. Develop a point and then start a new paragraph, either to elaborate, or start a new point. It gives the reader's eye and brain a break, and a cue that there is a transition to make.