Tryptophan's profile

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AGE: 17
LOC: Manhattan Beach, CA
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: June 19

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Poetry / Cinderella
Version 2
0 Reviews   0 Comments
I sit in the moss as the clock strikes three. There is time to remember. To Sugar, lost in violence, struck with the irony of modernity. To my children, in a world where Ozymandias and Ginsberg reign. Better times been seen, where there was a dream. but the bullet flies faster. Fast is where we're going When sugar slipped me the slippers from under the step-sisters, time seemed slow. but now with methamphetamines and promiscuous drag queens, where is the time? Now with heart disease and ensla...
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Poetry / Cinderella
Version 1
0 Reviews   0 Comments
I sit in the moss as the clock strikes three. There is time to remember. To Sugar, lost in violence, struck with the irony of modernity. To my children, in a world where Ozymandias and Ginsberg reign. Better times been seen, where there was a dream. but the bullet flies faster. Fast is where we're going When sugar slipped me the slippers from under the step-sisters, time seemed slow. but now with methamphetamines and promiscuous drag queens, where is the time? Now with heart disease and ensla...
Ratings & Rankings
Humor/Satire / Letter to Poe
Version 1
6 Reviews   0 Comments
Adolf Hitler Chancellor of the Weimar Republic 2625 Schnitzel Way State of Berlin January 31, 1933 Dear Mr. Edgar Allen Poe: It is as if we are conjoined in a time-defying bond, Edgar. For I, Adolf Hitler, am your most ardent admirer, and I understand your innermost feelings, for such feelings I have felt too. Ooo, how the cruel winds of time have stripped from me all things pleasant! How the hands of war have savagely beaten all the green out of the forests I longed to dance in, and all the ...
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Humor/Satire / Letter to Poe
Version 1
6 Reviews   0 Comments
Adolf Hitler Chancellor of the Weimar Republic 2625 Schnitzel Way State of Berlin January 31, 1933 Dear Mr. Edgar Allen Poe: It is as if we are conjoined in a time-defying bond, Edgar. For I, Adolf Hitler, am your most ardent admirer, and I understand your innermost feelings, for such feelings I have felt too. Ooo, how the cruel winds of time have stripped from me all things pleasant! How the hands of war have savagely beaten all the green out of the forests I longed to dance in, and all the ...
Ratings & Rankings
Humor/Satire / Pixel Logic
Version 1
5 Reviews   0 Comments
Moans reverberate in my ears. No woman can doubt my sexual prowess. Not even _Sand Storm_ could droan out the noises that are ultimetly born from my tongue. They just can't help it; shit feels so good. Goddamn she's loud! Naruto's a fuckin' mute by comparison. Crap! Gotta pull an Atl-tab. Not that fucktard again. I'm right in the middle of vasoline time, and this douchebag pulls out his sword. Unfuckin believable. You think you see all the assholeism possible in Azeroth, and then suddenly Drk...
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Reviews
To preface, I disagree with your analysis of both 19th century literature (including realism, romanticism, transcendentalism, etc.) and your analysis of literature in the post-Hemingway literary world. I argue that classical literature is inherently indulgent as opposed to intelligent; the writings of Hawthorne, for example, provide sentences with several clauses not for imagery's sake or thematically-intriguing prose (like a Pynchon sentence), but instead to personally explain the symbolism ...
This chapter is incredibly funny. Many of your descriptions are vivid and interesting; for example, the description of the dress for the Sadie Hawkins's dance and of the virile young men of romantic-lore were brilliantly written. Your prose is conversationalist and flows easily. My only qualm is the occasional use of colloquialisms that seem to detract from the select areas where they are used. For example: "Once Mom was satisfied Sybil had received sufficient recognition for her outstanding ...
Your first page is the beginning of the exposition and, while it effectively describes the environment of the story, seems to oscillate between the language of an observer ("It was gone, all gone."), and the language of an omniscient narrator (The plant life was shriveled up, dead, or dying as the murky sky passed on.). I merely suggest that you develop either style, to make your writing more stylistically interesting. Personally, I prefer the first person language of a protagonist (that seem...
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