This is fantastic, truly. Your voice is fairly clear, a few bumps for me that I will get to, but powerful imagery. So many word choices and phrase to love. My only critique is of the choices of "conciliator" and "en tenebrae". i admit to not knowing these words before reading this so I googled them but their meanings didn't fit with the story at all. Otherwise, a simply delightful read of flash fiction.

Your second sentence needs capitalization and prance should be pranced. And why not 'creaks and crack(s)"? "hoof of his foot"? An animal has one or the other. This sounds like both. "fur of my skin" - sounds odd. Either just leave it as fur or change of to on. "curse at me" - should be 'curses' "cant" - missing apostrophe - twice "fur of my neck" - again, awkward "curtesy" - courtesy. "she scorns" needs capitalization. Overall it's interesting but it's hard to read with all the mistakes and l...

The last sentence about his mother's parents seems a little disconnected from the rest. Like an afterthought. I'd either tie it into the introduction or cut it altogether. Just because you are talking about one set of grandparents doesn't mean you _have_ to make mention of the other, to be fair. The realization of the missing head comes out awkwardly. We all know that the chicken is missing the head so I feel that it is being spelled out for us needlessly. Maybe he could ask his dad where the...

Absolutely beautiful. Best installment yet. The only thing I would change is killing Paco before going after Carla. Paco was a freak. I can't rate you for some reason but you know it's a ten. See you in comments.

If only all my news media was in limerick form. In #2, L2 I would cut "it got" - the commas slow the pace down in that line and the extra words create weight. I love them all.

The voice is still very poetic. I can tell that you normally write poetry over prose. There wasn't much mystery for me. I was pretty sure you were talking to your computer from the get-go. It may have been a good guess because I'm not seeing anything to obvious to tip me off. If you want to break out of poetry try constructing longer sentences. Make them more complex. Short ones when you need punch long ones to draw us in. Example: "I love to ask you...You educate me." could be more like, "I ...

Well done. Very interesting and engaging. You missed italicizing some of Chris's thoughts "Well, thought Chris. I tried" which feels inconsistent given all his other thoughts are italicized. " _It’s only murder_ " - It's doesn't need caps after the ellipses. I think Marvin will like it.

Beautifully written, your narrative voice is perfect. Well done. Critiques? When you talk about the waitress there are a few mentions of 'fascination', 'fantasizing', and you say, 'my fourteen...mind', and 'adolescent mind' all tightly together. It is the only section that feels like repeating information. The father. What kind of dad smokes pot, talks about chakras, sits in full lotus, and hates his son? Seems like a mention of having bi-polar disorder or some other illness (other than alcoh...

It's a little too straight forward. Instructions were not included. I'm doomed. Or something more 'outside the box' would help you.

I like the name Kate Thornton. It's a perfect name for a romance. I also like the opening. Something that most women can relate to. I'm also craving pulled-pork sandwiches. Good stuff. I don't much care for this sentence, "Clearly a tourist, ... accent." You can hear the accent in the dialogue and the tag is very telling. How about, "she gum-smacked in her sharp New Jersey accent." We'll get the tourist part. "different little pockets" - cut different. it's implied. "Occasional streaks of sun...