TeamDDI's profile

You are killing me! I want to know more about these girls!!! :) I've always enjoyed stories or movies where the heroines star, and I especially like Aries, perhaps because of me being born in April under Aries. Not sure what her special abilities are, but I'm speculating. I also loved how Watesha discovered her water abilities. Just keep crafting this, it has some potential and I'll definitely be looking for other samples!

I could almost picture myself back in elementary school with the teacher reading this out loud. The way the story rhymes and teaches about friendship and trusting others....and of course say please, and not steal some cheese. I had visions of the animals in my head, also recalling the children's storybooks that were read to me at bedtime. There's one part that seems to trouble me just a little and yet I'm still trying to think of a way to fix it: The rats ate the Jackson’s cheese right away. ...

I like how this is a typical husband and wife humor/satire. I guess this would be a future situation for me if I ever get married if my wife wants to remodel of the kitchen into a spa, something that I'd hurt myself over since I like to eat...and no we're not looking for restaurants to make comparisons! Though, I have a funny feeling that in this story that the wife WILL have her decisions won over.

Well, as requested by your notes...you definitely did a great job in putting together a scene for the reader. The entire time I was inside the head of the main character as I wonder what is it that she's going through...a pregnancy, did someone knock her out and her subconsciousness was aware of what's going on around her though? I'm probably completely off but that's the magic in the reader being able to picture this scene. Very good.