Nilla's profile

I love the historic feel of this poem. It takes me back to the time when women worked by candle light till their fingers bled. The use of rhyme if very effective, and done well. The poem reads very clearly, and I feel like I understand the woman's disdain. The only part of the poem that seems off to me is the last line. There is no suggestion of where she is going or why. It seems like this line was an afterthought, fit in as a way to rhyme with "unravel." I think this poem would beneift from...

I think this poem is easy to understand. Someone is unable to get his/her ex-lover out of their head. To make this poem more dynamic, I suggest more visceral images. I can't see this person's uneasiness. I want to know what the sheets feel like against the person's anxious skin. What does it feel like to not be able to relax? There is room for some similies and metaphors here. You say "these noises are too loud." What noises? Let us in to hear them. Is there traffic in the background? Are the...

This is one of those poems that makes me say, "Now that is a poet." I really like the title. It is actually what made me read the poem in the first place. Such a unique idea. As another reviewer said, I love how you pull us back to the scene on the train with "Don't put your tongue on that window." You make it clear that this is narration is happening "live"--the word "that" (such as "make that face" and "that window") was a really effective choice. Your images are really fresh: "rain makes a...

I've read about a dozen poems on urbis so far, and this ranks as one of the best. This is obviously the work of a mature writer (finally!) I really perked up with the contrast of the lines: "You’re chaos was enlightening, Even borderline frightening." Very effective rhyme throughout the entire poem. There were no lines where I thought to myself, "The writer just used this word because it rhymes." The last two lines really sum up the author's feelings for this former lover. I can definitely re...