I would put in a bit more information/detail about your father's accident. The part about your mother longing for the piano, should that be "had" so longed for? It's amazing the way you talk about not putting him in temptation's way, making clear what happened so subtly. Good work on that. What explosion? That's another area I would make a little bit clearer. I think it should be "accepting" bids, in that part. A "real high" of emotions at home - maybe specify what sort of emotions? I mean, i...

This is lovely! Great use of descriptive language and onomatopeia to evoke the carefree feeling of just being out in the rain. I love the repetition of "Come on Annie!" Sorry to have a review with no constructive criticism, but there's really nothing I would do different here. Great work.

Overall this is pretty good. The first part might work better if you took out the "to me" and had it just "crying a familiar song..." Also, in the next part, it should probably be "the living dead LET" instead of lets. Just a grammatical thing. In the second part, it might work well to take out the "as if" in the part about the angel and the lovers. Just get the image out there without that, you know? and see how it works. Also, maybe you could try "a ghost shockingly similar" without the "lo...

This is very descriptive and well-written...I'm not sure I would do anything different. Maybe make it a tiny bit more abstract. No complaints, though.

This is really emotional (without being "emo") and the imagery is beautiful. If i would change anything, it would be the...I guess the rhyme scheme. It throws me off a bit the way you have the first and last verse rhyming, but not the middle ones. Also, there are maybe a few extraneous words. Overall though...very pretty.

In the first paragraph, "Dry leaves crackled underfoot as Leslie stepped out of her car. She shook her head when she spotted Jim’s car"...I maybe wouldn't say car twice there. Tiny bit redundant. A synonym might work? This is so sweet, I really enjoyed it. I love your thing about "happier than a moth in a fabric factory". There's not much I would do different, besides maybe some small grammatical things. Please keep writing. :c)

Definitely interesting! I love the "zombie in a sundresss" thing. I would fix the title, though, unless you meant it that way as some clever post-modernistic whatever. Just sayin'.

Very cool - apparently somewhere in the Bible, Jesus said "Cleave the wood and you will find me; lift the stone and I am there." Wish I could remember where that was..! Anyway, this makes me think of the quote, so I guess it did its job. you rock haiku. : )

This is a cool idea - it might be more powerful if in the beginning it said something like "you, who thinks you're so clever"...might make it sound more scornful, more condescending, and that would probably work well with this. It also might be good to flesh out this character of Sally Rose a little bit more...maybe give a physical description of some sort, of her innocence, her beauty, why the Jackal is so intent on destroying her. Maybe she's too "good" for her own good? Too sickeningly swe...

This is beautiful! I love the imagery and how each type of alcohol, each stanza, can be seen as taking the reader through a different phase of life. Very cool, very "natural", really captures the feeling that I think haiku generally tries to convey. Very Zen.