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Niansahc's profile
AGE:
28
LOC: Richmond, VA
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: August 07
LOC: Richmond, VA
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: August 07
I’ve been writing since I was a little girl. I’ve written fiction, nonfiction, short stories, and essays… but poetry has always been the best indicator of what’s going on in my head and my world at any given moment.
I write feelings. I write words down that sound good next to one another. The combination of the two results in what I consider to be a unique if overly masculine treatment of my weird female suffering.
Mostly I’m poking fun at myself.
I’m the training coordinator in the corporate headquarters of a international shipping company. I have a six year old son who also writes a little poetry here and there. I live in a two-bedroom ant farm of an apartment that still suits me.
I had a cat that I hated, and that loved…
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There was something shiny On the back steps today And my first instinct Was to scoop it up, Wrap it up, Give it to you. It was a huge dead beetle, Crunchy like a sculpture And I was a cat laying a dead Mouse at your feet And for the first time I wasn't afraid that I'd get thwapped and Thrown outside.
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On either portion Of a cracked mirror Same general outlook On, fuck, whatever But the view is skewed Like closing one eye And looking at your face Then switching to the Other and you're suddenly Up there. How do you do that?
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Oh from the land of Too Much Not Enough Come the silly lovers Who think they've made A difference in each Other so great that The land of Too Much Not Enough is erased Like a history of Violence can be erased With a hold touchy touchy- And isn't it so, Silly lovers? Isn't it so?
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She scratches at her shoulders She can't make the skin smooth Sometimes her skin gets harder It might turn out just fine some day But for now it's worse and worse.
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Untitled Sister II??? It's like her eyes didn't mean anything And it wasn't the unblinkingness and It wasn't the white. I tried to call you on my string Tree house to tree house (Broken swing hanging half down waiting for summer to care enough) Can jangling with my shaking hand It's like her eyes didn't mean anything And looked right through me without Stopping. I like to watch my feet dangle Miles above anything solid. It's like her eyes didn't mean anything To me anymore. Like I couldn't cr...
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Good beginning, but I think I might be missing the point. I know you want to flesh this out... and the last lines are very clever... but nothing prior to the last lines makes them clever. Rethink everything but the last two sentences and try to build up to them. I know you can.
Sci-fi is so tough in short form. This wasn't bad, but it did seem a little contrived. I hate to say this, but you could turn this into a rather risque little smut story. Let's hear it for chicks with blue hair!
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This was clever. I enjoyed it... mostly because I've suffered through the Monster.com hell. (Yes, thank you, Mr. King, for your Tommyknockers.) Very fun!
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This is very poignant and moved me to tears... thank you. I have one question: was Sophia not Catholic? Killing herself would prevent her from spending an eternity with Ed. I'd imagine an Italian family with that domnant a father would be Catholic. Also... you change the spelling of her name towards the end. Just an observation.
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