ITEMS (5)
NatashaTragedy's profile
AGE:
16
LOC: Newland, NC
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: December 14
LOC: Newland, NC
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: December 14
Everybody wants a piece of my world.
Items
Version 1
0 Reviews
0 Comments
This howling demon is thrashing in my stomach- shoving the obvious up through my esophagus- ready to eliminate jealousy - self-hatred - dejection. The demon suffocates me- in undying attempts to prove how selfish I am- ...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
1 Review
0 Comments
I left you lying in pieces. Cradled the chance to claim synthetic happiness and drained myself of self-control. I strive for the unacheivable while you remain numb. So subtle you seem lifeless. I faced you, and continue to every second I'm without company. Where I could repair, I simply ignore. Ignore your voice, breathing, reason, existence. I trust the cheap attractive surface to bare my treading, though I feel it crack like thin ice with every step in progression. Making me shudder. Makin...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
9 Reviews
0 Comments
Everyones watching I'm not afriad anymore This Is Who I Am
Ratings & Rankings
[ View all items ]
Reviews
I am in assent with you. Five years old is such a better time that what we know now. I believe my favorite stanza is the last one. It makes me a little sad.
I love this metaphor! It's so true, and so nicely worded!!! I'm interested in reading more of your work. Nothing I can say to help you better this quote or anything of that sort. It's excellent.
Your lack of punctuation almost creates an effect like a rush. Like everything is pouring out all at once, which is what I get from this. Since you are considering changing it, I think you should also keep this original version up also, because it's very well thought out. I enjoyed your words such as 'insistent' and 'torrent'. If you improve this much more it will more than likely be favorited by me. Thanks.
[ View all reviews ]
Favorites
People
