NIUArtist's profile

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AGE: 20
LOC: Dekalb, IL
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: August 25

Hi, My name is Alex. I am currently a student at Northern Illinois University studying to become a Graphic Designer. I have been involved in many art related programs since I was 8 years old but had not actively had an interest in writing until my Eighth grade English teacher told me that I had a knack for creative writing. Since then I have formulated and reworked the idea for a fantasy book series. It is quite difficult finding time to write while going to college full time and maintaining two part time jobs, one being at a bookstore and the other at a printing and design business. I am fairly ambitious when it comes to creating work for the two areas I have the most passion for and tend to get a bit elaborate and bite off more than I …

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Version 2
7 Reviews   4 Comments
He ran around the corner So fast and so small He bumped into a lady Who wore furs and was tall “Why such haste?” Asked the woman. “Can you not see? Now you should not move Till you apologize to me.” “I’m sorry Madam, I’m in a rush to cure death. The old man by the barrel. Is on his very last breath.” “I’m sorry to say boy, Death cannot be cured. You’re young and What I’m hearing is absurd.” “You do not believe me. I’ll show you, I can. Follow me to the barrel, And I’ll cure this old man.” Fro...
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Version 1
5 Reviews   4 Comments
He ran around the corner So fast and so small He bumped into a lady Who wore furs and was tall “Why such haste?” Asked the woman. “Can you not see? Now you should not move Till you apologize to me.” “I’m sorry Madam, I’m in a rush to cure death. The old man on the by the barrel. Is on his very last breath.” “I’m sorry to say boy, Death cannot be cured. You’re young and What I’m hearing is absurd.” “You do not believe me. I’ll show you, I can. Follow me to the barrel, And I’ll cure this old ma...
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Haiku/Senryu / Girl
Definition says that a Haiku is a syllable type poem 5,7,5 and you have 5,6,5. The poem itself is very good and you have great word choice. The middle line sounds too proper and grammatically incorrect. If you take out the word "and" in the middle line, it will read better and more like the person is listing off things that they could do, in addition to it sounding less awkward. I would also place a comma after "Girl" because that way it will be more direct and have less of a feel like a run-...
From what i gather, this poem is about someone wasting time over soemthing precious that was lost. Not sure if "beautiful" would be word to describe sorrow, The title is catchy, but i don't know as though it quite fits with the nature of the poem. There also needs to be more breaks, granted it is a short poem, it seems as though they are a bunch of one-liners cluttered together. try making "lost in time" a separate line, then i would make the next two three lines a stanza "moons-washed out" "...
Very Funny first off and very strange. I think that when the mother says "He's naked." The word "naked" should be capitalized, because otherwise it sounds more casual and not as big as a deal. The word "AND" in your response to your father's oddness should not be capitalized, it makes it awkward. Also i think that a transition of some sort is needed between the time that he runs from the lawnmower and the time that he gets on the phone. Its seems like "poof" and he's on the phone. How did he ...
Poetry / zoo
There is something very interesting about how the person acts like the tortoise in terms of love making. it is original but strange at the same time, however you did manage to pull it off well. It is a prime example of how we are much more like animals that we appear to be. I love the last two lines of the poem. It is a powerful image that should not go unnoticed. The way you word it is that you may have left your poem in with the tortoises and leads me to believe the character is a zookeeper...
This was an interesting poem. I'm not quite sure where you were going with the ink running dry. That part is confusing. Why mention that it was an IKEA rug? Does that bare any significance? Where they telling you to write "very, very sorry" in the card? Im guessing that the ink ran dry before you could write that. I think that the last four lines in the poem are good and needed to offset the sad tone of the poem. I think that the "and the's" in the fourth stanza should go before the actions/e...
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Children's / Snack Attack

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