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LAST LOGIN: September 06
LAST LOGIN: September 06
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Version 1
19 Reviews
3 Comments
"Don't wear the red shoes with that. It just makes your hands look large." "What?!" Madeline turned to her longtime friend with a look of confusion. She was busy dressing to go to a benefit dinner that her hotel chain was sponsering, and Livia seemed to be on some sort of strange narcotic. "Have you been at the glue stick Liv?" "No. What I am doing, darling, is mocking you. You have been standing in front of this mirror for two hours in and out of the same three dresses. The black dress with...
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I really like the simple way you've ended this and actually like it overall. I don't know exactly what is going on, but I think that is part of the charm for me.
I really liked this though I think it should be submitted as a short story. It was twisted enough, and pitiful enough to be just right.
There is some writing in here that is pretty tough to get through based on the structure. The second to last sentence to be exact. That being said the overall concept of this is great; live life for the now and don't live in the past. Why not be confident today and talk to the smartest girl you know? I am not sure if the four men represent one person, but I do like the concept. Just work on the structure of getting there.
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