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Mick_Parkin's profile
AGE:
51
LOC: United Kingdom
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: October 26
LOC: United Kingdom
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: October 26
I write novels from a ‘realistic’ perspective. They are usually set in the past because this gives me an excuse to find out about the lives of people who lived in very different circumstances to my own, and I find that very interesting. Also, this pre-existing reality imposed positive constraints on how the story can develop – unlike a bad sci-fi novel where the characters can resolve their problems by just disappearing into a different dimension. Also, my approach to writing makes it a collective collaboration with the hundreds of people who form the basis for my stories – rather than seeing myself as the lone genius.
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Version 1
2 Reviews
3 Comments
Chapter 2 Vincente Rosell takes the napkin from around his neck and wipes his mouth, rubbing vigorously to remove any bits from his bushy moustache. From the kitchen he can hear Maria, his wife, making coffee. He sits back and enjoys the sensation of feeling human again. When he got home – after ten hours at his lathe in Co-operativa Vigor, followed by two hours chairing a meeting of the CNT’s production committee, then a long journey across Barcelona – he had been dead on h...
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Version 2
4 Reviews
1 Comment
TO LIVE by Mick Parkin Prologue On Friday, 16th of April, 1937 – at exactly two in the afternoon and almost exactly nine months into the Spanish Civil War – a staff car with a truck full of Guardia Civil pulls up outside Co-operativa Metalica in Barcelona. Two men wearing red armbands get out of the car, go directly into the building and tell the receptionist they need to speak with whoever is in charge. When a delegate is called, they present him with an order authori...
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Generally good, but this is a classic case of showing the reader something, then telling them what you have just shown them, then telling them again. “Do you see this car here? We’ve got an unconscious man inside. So get back in your taxi and wait. Okay?” The taxi driver sat back, browbeaten. The ambulance man had the required level of assertion for the job. And this is a bit uneccesary too (in terms of repetition) At least someone’s looking for drunk drivers. At least I’ve received first-ha...
I like the way you use everyday language... but still come up with some very interesting and thought provoking phrases, like "Rows and rows of them, in airplane bellies" (bellies is good, cos it is specific) I don't think your stuff is humourous, but it is cutting satire that hits the mark without going all round the houses to do it. Er... what has happened to page 2?
I like your use of words like 'sexually amphibious', or the verb 'bunnied' It could seem too flash, but you pull it off. I would avoid the word await - which is pompous - and use "wait for" "How the revolution happened is another matter, however" - the self-conscious commentary is getting a bit much now. “Man, this is like total bullshit, hot stuff. What’s going on here, my sexy nigga?” - this bit made me laugh. I think the world is ready for story that takes the piss out of the sexual-incont...
100.0% Review Quality (3 Votes)
I think this is well written. You seem to be getting the balance right between creating pictures with specific descriptions, but also subtly moving the story on and filling in the background. // it sounded like the beating of a drum in a vast hall - this analogy doesn't really go with the context of a grubby bathroom. It's also like a heart beat, so that is something like a mixed metaphor. // Sometimes the style can be a bit verbose, such as the words 'quite simply' in - Alfie felt defeated ...
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