Okay, I had a hard time following at first but the after I found it a really neat story line. I can't follow the characters as well as I would like to. I like to know them, feel them, want to be thier friends or ememies and I didn't get that, but then again I think the story line is so fresh that making the characters more "real-life" wouldn't be too hard for you. This passage was my fave! I really enjoy the way the words flow. Keep it up! Lisa His story goes far back, into T.G.’s younger day...

Is this Salathiel, some sort of Christ-like figure? I really enjoyed your take on the angels and the roles they paly. It's really interesting and God knows people love a good read about good and evil! I found myself wanting to know more of the story and also know that your painting of the angels was perfect! You could really see them, really know them!

Is "Shoot" really cursing? Amelia is as real a character as you'll find. I love the discription of her bring in the bags and throwing her purse aside then running her hand over the scare on her face. I could really see all that. Blake is an interesting character and well drawn out. I like the mystery of him though something tells me I might not like him all that well when I find out what he's hiding. The storm was pretty intense, tornado? Whatever, it was well done and one could feel the terr...

You spoke of sleep coming gently in the first person and then it changed to the thrid person when you said "Soon he was floating out at sea staring up at a deep sky" are you talking of two differnt people? You use a lot of metaphor, and you do it very well. You paint a great picture of the inside of this person's head. But I left the story not really understanding what it was about...really. Was this the point? Not to sound rude, I'm just wondering if you mean for this to be the point...that ...

Whoa, slow down, it's not a race to the finish. I was breathless after the first two sentences. Too much info way too fast. I'm not sure who this person is sleeping with or whatever...I can't keep up. Take this slower. I review as I read, so stick with me. Otherwise I forget at the end of the story what I was going to say. You said, " let me light a cigarette, this may take a while. Not all changes were for the better." what does this mean? It's confusing, and doesn't lead anywhere. "To find ...

alter-it's altar Otherwise a powerful piece and very emotionally charged.

Aww, nice ending! Good flow too, I mean all the way through. no flahsing grammer mistakes, not long drawn out story lines. Quick and to the point. you really get a good picture of her suffering over that one event in her childhood. Nice job!

When we lit god's body? or when we left god's body? I was confused there. it is a very colorful piece and i found myself enjoying the flow very much. you have an interesting way of looking at man and his flaws. I like it. You did tend to use too many "ands' toward the end, but that can easily be fixed. Otherwise, it wasn't too bad at all:)

You said "Once upon an autumn," Did ya mean in autum? You said-"Although the Child tried to make the best of his situation, although" try not to use the same word twice so close together. Okay, getting tired of the word "child" maybe find another way to point out to the reader the child without using it so often. "long legs, strong legs"try "long, strong legs" it gets the point across and doesn't tired the reader. "and crawled from the lake and trudged seven miles and collapsed in his bed. An...

I pretty sure I either started reading this and had a "Stella Moment" as we call it in our house, she's the baby of the family (she's 4 now) and is forever needing something when I am in the middle of something. So I may or may not have left you a review. So I am re-read it for you. Here is what I think... I love the title first and foremost! Second, I think that Mrs. Woods is really a neat character and an interesting way to go about finding these new Bana kids in the making. As far as gramm...