JamesGallagher's profile

JamesGallagher avatar
AGE: 25
LOC: United States
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: November 09

I joined this site yonks ago and kind of forgot about it, but I recently started writing again and thought I might as well get back involved.

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Reviewer Stats
Items
Poetry / Gambling
Version 1
3 Reviews   0 Comments
Fingernails like fault lines, splitting from the weight Of my own body, I dangle from a precipice. A sandy tear freezes the tip of my nose. Too eager to stray from the usual path, imprisoned In a dried out wound of a river. Mourning clouds loom, Heavy with foreboding, like muddy scabs on pale skin. Numb fingertips brush against moving air and my gut floods. My trousers tear against mauled rock; everything is distant. My heels smash into the ground and my knees collapse. A sheep, naked and bru...
Ratings & Rankings
Short Story / Arthur Rackham diary
Version 1
7 Reviews   0 Comments
Dear Diary, Still, waves come and go, tumble and fall. Father had warned me of the tiresomeness of sea travel, he called it, ‘a good tonic for the constitution, but a stern test of patience.’ I do not know where I would be without my jolly old paint box though, that modest, silent, convenient companion. We capture the same horizon so frequently that we cling to rare moments, like the howling of a dolphin or a splatter of phosphor from between the stars. My fellow travellers are such sun-worsh...
Ratings & Rankings
Short Story / City of Eternal Spring
Version 1
16 Reviews   0 Comments
I pull over a green VW Santana 3000 and climb into the passenger seat. I show my palm to the driver, who laughs heartily at the spidery Chinese characters, haphazardly copied from my Lonely Planet. ‘Lutuo jiuba,’ he says. His rising tone makes it sound like a question. ‘Erm…Camel Bar?’ I dangle the name and hope for it to snag. ‘Ah, lutuo jiuba,’ he repeats, this time with more conviction. I shrug my shoulders and give him the thumbs up. ‘OK man!’ he cries, in a pretty authentic American acce...
Ratings & Rankings
Reviews
Poetry / Prized Body
This poem drops off the tongue nicely as you have a good sense of rythmn. I think it could be longer though. It really starts to get going in the penultimate stanza, where the subjects features sound tangible, like pieces of fruit on a market stall. I would have continued with that theme rather than ending with the repetition of the opening stanza. But a good poem overall.
Poetry / Fate's Answer
I like the piece. I feel you could work on the second stanza, or rather just the last two lines. They feel slightly disjointed and disrupt the poem's rythmn. But a nice piece of writing.
Journalism / Kids and Consumerism
This is a nice opinion piece and a story I'm sure most parents would sympathise with. The power of marketing to children is no secret and it is an industry that embraces all media. If you wanted to publish this piece as a piece of journalism, you may want to gather quotes from various angles. At the moment it is an opinion piece, but with a more neutral voice and some quotes from, say, the PR company working behind this product, an anti-capitalist group, a parent's group and a Government repr...
Journalism / Lost in Translation
Well I don't see how this is journalism; is more of a poem. I don't understand where 'lost in translation' comes into it, other than a general feeling of being misunderstood.
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