Iffer's profile

Iffer avatar
AGE: 18
LOC: Danvers, MA
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: November 18

hey everyone
    Well i love poetry and writing, otherwise i wouldn’t be here.  I’m 17 years old. Besides writing i love to act and sing on the stage. I love comments from all, i dont get offended easily so let me have it! I guess thats it for now.  Hope we get to know each other.

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Version 1
0 Reviews   0 Comments
hi hey im talking to nicole on the phone shes a little tipsy again? yupp... my roomate is extremely high right now. i love her she's hysterical you're lucky my roommates a prude but he's beautiful NO HES NOT i hope phil is less prude-ish he looks chill! she wants a fridge so she can eat cereal. special k chocolate delight is her fav. go figure! ! thats amazing i asked phil if he wants a fridge good for you! I KNOW!!!!! whats that supposed to mean/ ? you know exactly what it menas 'portions fo...
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Haiku/Senryu / You Know I'm Right
Version 2
5 Reviews   3 Comments
    what is that feeling in the crevice of unknown?      bug in my buttcrack
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 Plus-button Clarity
Poetry / Jingle Bells
Version 2
1 Review   2 Comments
Squinting rectangles, beige and brash Squeezing eyelids, kiss my ass. Velvet earlobes, jiggle jangles I tried to prove congruent triangles. I  failed to show how my cat kisses me, Unfortunately tan hunting boots kick me in the teeth, Choking on the worn enamel, gurggling the roots, Flowered lips and bleeding gums. I love it when the catepillars come. Unibrows protruding and elbows dry, Watering the flowers, soaking the roots With the tears the Earth cries. Static electricity, clashi...
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Poetry / Butterfly Kisses
Version 1
1 Review   2 Comments
 Bashful lemons lift the grease of the elderly Keeping little cups of tartar sauce on the mantle,  Next to an urn of ashes of clay.   Marble floor tiles litter my front yard, Scattered next to the komodo dragon That tended my garden while I was away.   Little rows of duct tape stuck on the white brick wall, Keeping the foundation from cracking Under the weight of broken glass, Shimmering in the pale green moonlight, Infused with the dust of the sun, And ever-changing in th...
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Poetry / Jingle Bells
Version 1
0 Reviews   0 Comments
Squinting rectangles, beige and brash Squeezing eyelids, kiss my ass. Velvet earlobes, jiggle jangles I tried to prove congruent triangles. I  failed to show how my cat kisses me, Unfortunately tan hunting boots kick me in the teeth, Choking on the worn enamel, gurggling the roots, Flowered lips and bleeding gums. I love it when the catepillars come. Unibrows protruding and elbows dry, Watering the flowers, soaking the roots With the tears the Earth crys. Static electricity, clashin...
Ratings & Rankings
Reviews
Poetry / The Stars
im a little confused as to what the point of this poem is. it isnt bad, far from it in fact. however it could definitely use some work, you are writing this poem talking about people and assuming that the readers know who these people are, it wasnt until half way through that i realized that they were lovers of some kind. there are a few spots throughout the poem that dont flow quite as nicely as they should. and also it's 'breath' not 'breathe' overall this poem is pretty good, it just needs...
Poetry / Knight's Code
well, i dont love it, but i definitely dont hate it :) i always enjoy a good sonnet, and this one is not too shabby, im exactly sure what the point is that you're trying to get across, in other words the meaning is a little unclear, i like the voice of the piece, it sounds sophisticated and of the time in which the style of the sonnet is from. keep writing :) -iffer
Poetry / Destiny
hello the point that you are trying to make here is very obvious and very clear, good job. You should be congratulated for the intricate rhyming within the lines of the poem. However like most works this one could use some editing. The poem itself should be longer, graduating high school is one of the most exciting and scary times in your life, let people know! dont just ask the questions, express your feelings about these questions! we want to know you from the words that you write! keep wri...
Poetry / neutrino love
I thought it only fair that I review one of yours... I love it, honestly I do, I have to admit that I had to look up the definition of "neutrino" and after I did the meaning of the poem just smacks you in the face, which is a good thing...I love that it's really short, you express your idea in a few simple yet complex lines, that takes true talent...I'm just guessing here but is the "life" of a neutrino .3 seconds? the definition that I looked up said it was some sort of massless particle tha...
this poem seems to have almost a metaphysical feel to it, however im not sure i grasp what the poem is actually saying...i can comprehend the seeing of beauty in all the different things but i dont quite understand the heaven part of it.
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