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HermiG's profile
AGE:
17
LOC: Norway
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: October 25
LOC: Norway
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: October 25
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Version 1
9 Reviews
7 Comments
The size of the houses, as well as their magnificence, increased as he got closer to the castle. Here the upper floors rested on beautifully engraved pillars, the walls were thicker and kept the cold out. Some of the windows even had curtains. There were also more people outside in the streets here; servants carrying buckets of water chased away children, tip-toeing for a peek through one of the windows; a man with a flute, wearing a torn piece of clothing, tried to earn money for his living;...
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You clearly have a talent for writing! I really like the pacing of this piece of writing, and I also think you describe the scene well! What I find a little confusing, though, is the sudden change in the main character's behaviour. Maybe you could hint a little more to the ending? As a final note - I hope you're often bored! Keep writing!
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