Here I am mainly concerned with your choice of rhyming words. Barack doesn't go well with truck or luck. I also feel that this limerick fails to make any real point through what it says.

The last line sits as a bit unclear, beyond that I would say that this was a good write. You might consider putting a period at the end of line two and starting line three with, ''It's a...'' and not ''In a...''. Other than that it was a pretty solid write. JW

A strange rhyme pattern is implemented here, though I must admit that it works well with all that is being said. I like how the third stanza changes from ABBC to AABC with C becoming a rhyming pair for the second and third stanzas. I did notice that the word ''long'' seemed a bit overused. In S1L2 you might consider putting, ''It seems so far away...'' instead of, ''It is so long away...''. Also in S3L1 you might replace ''long'' with the words ''wish'' or ''need''. Other than those minor thi...

I believe that it is our planet that you are describing here. I like your ''cold attic'' metaphor, especially when considering the frozen depths of space. Well done. JW

I take it that the "him" character described in your front yard would have to be the moon and I'm also gonna guess that the "leather jacket" was your way of describing the dark side of the moon. I think your use of metaphor was pretty clever for the moon, although there were many things that I noticed that need improvement. The "standing on his sphere" part makes me think that the character couldn't be the moon because it seems like he would have to be standing on himself. Who would he then b...

Not a bad piece you've got here. I think the last four lines were your strongest and I like how the single rhyme pair seals the deal at the end. It seems like you were more focused on how you were saying things which might have taken away from what could've been a bit better. Everything is there, it just needs a little polishing. That's just my opinion...it's still going to be a damn good write regardless. JW

This didn't really seem like a poem to me but it was written quite well and it does manage to tell a story. A couple of things did manage to stand out to me. The first thing would have to be how line 11 seems to jog right off the page. This appears to be something that was unintended. I did catch a few comments that were most definately racially motivated. These comments didn't help to enhance your write in my opinion. If anything, they only took away from a really good write. Perhaps this wa...

Call me stupid, I just don't see how Crowley's mama plays into this. Beyond the brew that was seemingly enjoyed, it was hard for me to find any real point being made here. This limerick has failed. It seems to be lacking relevance and comedic value. Until next rhyme. JW

I think you have a nice start here but there is definitely room for improvement. Your words and imagery seemed pretty good up until the third stanza. "Sleepless nights and the mutual oak" doesn't make much sense to me, what is this "mutual oak"? L4 in the third stanza seems to be a bit odd as well, I think "..I got addicted" should change to "..that keeps me addicted" or something similar. L3 in the fifth stanza doesn't mesh with the rest of what you are saying. There is very little romantic ...

I think that this write was written as a thought of uncertain response. From what I've seen, I would have say that "Cotton Wool" didn't help contribute to the forming of your "CLOTH". I would actually have to admit that "Cotton Wool" is a much better poem. This poem seems to me to be lacking, I would say that this is mainly due to the weak usage of wording and a somewhat poor structure. The first two stanzas are OK but after that everything gets a bit screwy. First, "no thing has meaning" sou...