Errwen's profile
AGE:
20
LOC: United States
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: July 24
LOC: United States
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: July 24
She’s fragile in her own way. She’s lucky in many others. Happy, Silly, Tragic, Passionate, Quiet. How can you put a name to a free spirit? She will never be tamed. Never be put to rest. She is restless and free. Free to choose. Free to feel. Free to be.
Items
Version 1
7 Reviews
0 Comments
The chairs were a nasty faded peach color. The walls were teal and only matched the chairs in ugliness. The people were nice enough. She was reminded of some obscure 80's movie scene. The chairs were so closely put together that she couldn't help but wonder what this place might look like with twenty people packed in… like that would ever happen… This place..was not the most comforting. This place is only for them, those that reap consequences for bad decisions. She was a good girl. Made good...
Version 2
1 Review
0 Comments
I bundled my body with a scarf, a knitted cap and a wool button up sweater. 6:50 a.m. and I was on my way to the outside world. As I stepped into the early dawn, I saw nothing that reminded me of morning. The sky was blacker still with small pinpoints of shining light. The air wrapped his long crisp fingers around my form. My nose immediately felt his cold breath and turned a slight rosy color. My cheeks were next and suddenly, I was transformed. I was not an average college student attending...
Version 4
9 Reviews
1 Comment
The air was crisp.. a light shone shyly through a cracked door. Shadows played across his face.. Everything looks beautiful in soft light. The mars and embarrassments are not seen.. only bright green eyes and a hint of excitement. Fingertips like fire trace circles into bare skin. Searing their mark.. forever etched. Locked into each other’s souls.. nothing can shake the stare of longing. Bonded together by uncertainty but unwavering emotion.. he cradles her. No longer are the worries of her ...
Version 3
1 Review
1 Comment
The air was crisp.. a light shone shyly through a cracked door. Shadows played across his face.. Everything looks beautiful in soft light. The mars and embarrassments are not seen.. only bright green eyes and a hint of excitement. Fingertips like fire trace circles into bare skin. Searing their mark.. forever etched. Locked into each other’s souls.. nothing can shake the stare of longing. Bonded together by uncertainty but unwavering emotion.. he craddles her. No longer are the worries of her...
Version 1
4 Reviews
4 Comments
Enchantment Rapture. Music flows like silk, softly touching my ears. The sheets feel soft around my body... A haven for the weary... A cough racks. A fever soars. Sweat beads on my forehead. Release. Escaping from this wretched weakness is no easy task. Laying in bed...I swallow my remedies.. Hoping to Escape.
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Reviews
Interesting concept... I smiled to myself as I read it. I would classify this as more of blogging or journal entry though. Its not so much a "story" or not the format of one. The puncuation is a bit confusing too. But I did like the main point of the piece. Ha! paying for recycling.. geez.
I'm not sure the format works well for this poem. It breaks in places that shouldn't and then is too long in others. The line "something came during the night and burglarize your saneness.." Bulgarize you saneness? it doesn't make sense with the rest of your line. Try to reword this. I know that both bulgarize and saneness are legitimate words but they sound extremely awkward in this sentence. I like how you bring the memory of her youth out in the poem. It is apparent the that the author is ...
I love it! Its a harsh reality. Somehow it seems like you may be missing out on life, yet.. what kind of life is it? Is it the one you want, or merely a life you could have had, indifferent to most of it. Its amazing how guys will always make us change. Sometimes for the better sometimes for the worse. Some things we don't mind giving up, others we do. In this poem, I like the way you leave the reader wondering if you are happy missing your plane to Boston or if you wanted to that lovely mess...
Bravo! I love it! Questions that SO many of us ask ourselves! And yet, no one can seem to find the appropriate answers. I definitely love the one about being unfashionable in winter! I'm right there with you! Get me some warm clothing, and throw out the style :) I think the last sentence is definitely a key part to all these questions. Even though equality is supposed to be practiced.. for the most part, it is distant and remote. A strong woman with self-respect, independence and dignity is h...
For being 13, I must say GOOD JOB! I never would have thought to write such imagery at that age, especially concerning love. I don't want to critize too much, but it is sort of a cliche poem. A lot of people have compared love to roses, dying, nature, that sort of thing. It flows well and the message is clear and honest. It is good. Next time, try to branch out and compare love to something that most people would never think of or even look at to compare love. Just an idea! Well done :)
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