Dark_Elf's profile

Dark_Elf avatar
AGE: 26
LOC: United States
GEN: Female
LAST LOGIN: November 27

My pen name is Nicole A. Stephans, you can call me Nicole if you like.  

I have a degree in Medieval English Literature and am working on a Masters. I joined this site to share my current project and hopefully get some helpful feedback on how to better my writing.
Though I write heavily in the Science Fiction/Fantasy genre, my writing has been influenced by writers from every spectrum of the literary world, from Chaucer, Marlowe, Austen, and even Rowling. My biggest influence would have to be John Milton and his work “Paradise Lost.”
Anyway, my life and love is literature and writing. I hope to be a successfully published, mainstream author one day. No vanity publishers please.

I’m currently working on a Fantasy series titled…

(more)

Item Stats
Reviewer Stats
Items
Version 1
3 Reviews   4 Comments
                                                             Chapter Four      What rain the garden canopy could not keep from falling on the woman and her angel, Lucifer’...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
2 Reviews   1 Comment
                                                         Chapter Three      It took the woman several minutes to orient herself after she woke. Lucifer watched with great interest as she sat u...
Ratings & Rankings
Sci Fi & Fantasy / The Sons of Light - Chapter Two
Version 1
2 Reviews   1 Comment
                                                          Chapter Two      Sitting on his haunches, hidden among the top most limbs of a nearby tree, Michael listened and watched, his heart bu...
Ratings & Rankings
Sci Fi & Fantasy / The Sons of Light - Chapter One
Version 1
3 Reviews   2 Comments
                                                         Chapter One      Golden jets of sunlight knifed through the blue, cloudless sky, piercing through the green foliage of forest canopy. The ra...
Ratings & Rankings
Version 1
1 Review   0 Comments
                                                           Chapter Two      It took the woman several minutes to orient herself after she woke. Lucifer watched with great interest as she ...
Ratings & Rankings
Reviews
Sci Fi & Fantasy / Glanticór, part I
You have a great start to a promising story. I wanted to read more from the get-go. I noticed a few immediate errors: In the third sentence, instead of "chattering hooves" it should be "clattering hooves". This sentence could be better: "As he rode into the shadows the wall cast, he saw the boats which were tied to the quay at the opposite side of the lake." I was thinking something more along the lines of: As he rode through the shadows cast by the wall, he noticed the boats tied to the quay...
Sci Fi & Fantasy / Night By Fire; Chapter 2
Again, I honestly am not crazy about this piece. As I said in my review to your first chapter, it has to do with your sentence structure, punctuation, and point of view. You're the one telling the story. Your readers are getting a story told to them by the author about something that happened to someone else. We want to see and experience the story from your character's point of view, not yours. It's not "your" story, it's Jasmine's. Do you understand what I'm saying? If not, go back and read...
Sci Fi & Fantasy / Night by Fire
Honestly, I wasn't crazy about this piece. It was difficult to read because of the sentence structure within. For example: Your opening sentence is jarring. "It was only the light of dawn, saffron and rose, showing through her window, not fire in the night sky." Your readers get the fact that it's dawn, so we don't need the last fragment about the night sky. Rework this sentence so that it's smooth and rolls right off the tongue. You could do something like this: "The light of dawn shone thro...
Action Adventure / Pandora's Succession
The premise of your story is interesting. When or if you decide to post subsequent chapters of this work, I'd love to read them and see how the myth of Pandora is inlayed throughout (if you decided to do that at all). I see a few problems that can be easily fixed: "When a defecting Ares scientist offers him the opportunity to help put Ares out of business," First of all, what do you mean by "defecting scientist"? Secondly, omit the second time you used the name Ares and instead write, "...off...