D_W_Pederson's profile Prolific-icon-large

D_W_Pederson avatar
AGE: 59
LOC: Everett, WA
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: March 17

This user has not yet uploaded an urbis user description/profile.

Item Stats
Reviewer Stats
Items
Young Adult / Fear No Darkness
Version 1
2 Reviews   2 Comments
It had been another bad night for Jack Repnik. A visit from his dad had ineffably turned into an argument between his parents. The same thing happened any time his dad visited. His parents seemed to fight over every little thing these days. They were now separated, living apart but his father would sometimes visit him, usually after he had been drinking. It wouldn’t have been so bad if it had been any other night, but the next morning he had finals in his high school math and science cl...
Ratings & Rankings
 Plus-button Clarity
Version 1
0 Reviews   0 Comments
Alan Stone awoke the next morning, determined to see Angelique again under better conditions. He arranged with the captain to have the day off, in order, as Alan put it “To sort out things in my head.” The captain was reluctant, but he sensed Alan was dealing with a perplexing internal conflict, so he let him go. “You might as well go. It seems I won’t get any good work out of you otherwise. Go get yourself a good mug down at the bar and just take it easy, but what ev...
Ratings & Rankings
 Plus-button Clarity
Short Story / The Hangmans But
Version 1
1 Review   0 Comments
Slowly he walks up the steps like so many others; shoulders hunched, head down, a priest at his side. He comes here to take his punishment, but what if he is innocent? They say the crime was hideous, one not spoken of, except in whispers. Surely he deserves this punishment, but what if he is innocent? The due process has taken its course. Judge and jury have found guilty without reasonable doubt, but what if he is innocent? Step by step he nears the top. He lifts his large round head and lo...
Ratings & Rankings
Young Adult / Clear Blue chapter 1
Version 1
6 Reviews   0 Comments
Grass grew through the skeletons of rusting cars and the scattering of old parts in the corner of the lot; hidden treasure to some, discarded castoff’s to most, but among the jumble, one other prize. This was the treasure the three boys were after. "My dad said she was up here somewhere," a tall redheaded teenager yelled. Two other boys followed closely behind him, one a medium build brunette and the other a slightly stubby teenager with jet-black hair. “There she is,&rd...
Ratings & Rankings
Novel Treatments / The Loss of Bother Jonathan
Version 3
2 Reviews   4 Comments
  Rain and wind beat against the cold granite pillar. A solitary man in a Pandora and rain slicker overcoat stood staring at the names carved in its face. Slowly he mouthed the names of the dead. He shivered with cold and pain as he came to that beloved name “Angelique”. His eyes moved down to the date inscribed in the rock, November 1868. Had it already been a year since that fateful day? How could anyone predict such a tragic end to lives so innocent, so joyful? And how was...
Ratings & Rankings
 Plus-button Clarity
Reviews
Sci Fi & Fantasy / Knew Campton 1-Ch1 & 2 of 4
You have a great ability to paint with words. Your words are able to bring characters to life. I like this opening. "Wiping away sweat, Sherriff Alcoy ran his hairy plump hands over his bald head. The creaking ceiling fans provided little air circulation within the cramped deputy department. “I like you all to welcome Drevan Wolfe, our newest deputy.”" You should check your spelling and missing words. Here are a few examples. “She basically rambles on about nothing and (end)s most of her sess...
Novel Treatments / Freedom in Alaska
Locked
Novel Treatments / Rayne
Locked
You have a very good grasp of vocabulary and a very descriptive way of writing. At times however I felt I was getting to much description. In the first part of the story, all we get is what seems like a fly-over of the scene. If that is what you intended I think you succeeded, but it would have be nice to use that to bring us to the house of your main character, Worth. When we finally get down to the story you again have amazing descriptions of the scene. We see the lonely life of an alcoholi...
Novel Treatments / Blood Red Sky
I think you write quite well. You have a good grasp of the psychological state of your characters. I think this piece would be better if you give a little more physical characteristics of your characters. I also have no idea where you are going with the story. Pastor Blood is damaged psychologically and he doesn't want Sky to be,but it seems to me it takes to long to say that. I think you also change POV when talking about his wife. This was a bit confusing. I also found some minor grammatica...
Favorites
ITEMS (15)

 

Young Adult / Can't Fake Gravity
Novel Treatments / Rayne

[ View all ]