CourtshipLives's profile
AGE:
21
LOC: Miami, FL
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: November 18
LOC: Miami, FL
GEN: Male
LAST LOGIN: November 18
check out my blog:
www.theapplejuicepact.tumblr.com
Items
Version 1
1 Review
0 Comments
Lying on the edge of the flowery lake Her hair flowed like currents of soft autumn hues And smoky lashes bordered Her sparkling green eyes I kissed her under the tree Where we carved our names in time Where the old tire swing hung And lobbed us into the lake every summer On the same patch of grass Where I memorized Every freckle constellation on her cheeks And every orange fleck inside her eyes Across from the bridge Where she dangled her feet Over the cool, misty water And proposed to me ...
Version 2
4 Reviews
0 Comments
This noose hugged me tighter than you ever did, And the chill of death's warmer than your summer kiss Is this really how our story ends? Your back on his mattress, My spine on the bend? I'm covered in flashlights, you're covered in "friends." While sirens moan for me how you never will again.
Version 1
0 Reviews
0 Comments
This noose hugged me tighter than you ever did, And the chill of death's warmer than your summer kiss Is this really how our story ends? Your back on your mattress, My spine on the bend? I'm covered in flashlights, you're covered in "friends." While sirens moan for me how you never will again.
[ View all items ]
Reviews
this is awesome. i am favoriting this, which i rarely do. i love how the whole story is about making fun of how society has a propensity to degrade things by labeling and categorizing to no end. some people my say its biased because the only real country u stopped in was america. but regardless. even the way the story makes fun of itself in this metaphysical way is amusing. this very similar to a one act play i am doing at school called "the whole shebang" only that is about the idea of the u...
this is good. but a huge tease. what happens? does he eat her? finish it!
this is cool. idk exactly what its about. but i guess its ambiguous in a good way because i can pin a lot of different possible meanings to it. its either about a guy whos addicted to his computer, a guy becoming a computer, a computer as the narrator, or a robot. it seems to work from each perspective. id like to know from which u wrote it, if any of those i mentioned. the rhyme scheme is okay, but i think it limits the power of this piece. this could be alot more graphic and intense and all...
i really like this. i think stuff like this all the time, but often its hard to translate my thoughts to words as well as u have here. i like the three devices u use: contrasting u and her, the vanilla sky thing about how without the sour the sweet wouldnt be, and all the obstacles ur willing to face just to be with her. they all work really great together. theres no real story, but i guess there doesnt need to be since youre just professing your love and devotion to her. overall, sweet poem....
this is more of a prayer than a poem it seems. and without any dense knowledge of islam, the reader can't make heads or tails of this. i know i couldnt. but thats just my opinion. im sure it makes sense to someone of islamic faith though.
[ View all reviews ]
Favorites
People




















